Today is August 26 2009, which is coincidentally the day of Chinese Valentine Day. So happy valentine's day for everyone who sees this =D
Also, today, it has been more than 5 months since my last post. I wonder if everyone has given up on my blog because i have been putting off writing it for so long.
Today i decided to come to this page because i remembered something i said a long time ago. It had something to do with smiling.
I remembered how many times in my life i had stopped smiling. Or at least the major events that made me not feel like smiling. Even in one of the prior posts i implied that i would be able to smile regardless of what was happening at that time and yet i failed.
Today, i am smiling again. Of cause i have also been smiling a lot the past few months but in this case, it is one of those special situations again.
In the blink of an eye, more than half of my friends are in relationships already. If not, they are down the path towards one. My point? I'm happy for them. This in turn brings me to quote something a friend said a couple of weeks back - "and then there was one". When he said that, he seemed a million miles away from his own story, today, he seems just within arms reach of it. It is now just left to how he decides and fate thus leaving that quote in my hands now.
Coming back to the smiling thing, i think i have developed a really bad habit. In the past, people always complained i never smiled enough. I took that advice and decided to smile. Guess what happened? Yep, i can't stop smiling anymore - not when i'm depressed, not when i'm sad, not when i'm lonely and perhaps, even not when i'm crying (i'm not sure about it actually, coz i haven't cried yet)
Along with that habit came another - "don't worry" or as i like to say it in japanese "dai jo bu" or in chinese, "放心啦". I'm saying this so much, there have been a few that are complaining i'm starting to hide my true feelings and thoughts. Maybe they are right, afterall, lately i feel like i don't want to bother or trouble anyone anymore. Everyone has their own troubles, and i don't feel like adding more for them.
I have a feeling with the paragraph above, people are going to want to kill me again... Better start running~~ haha~~
Anyways, till next time and don't worry about me.
Lai Jian Wei
3.44pm
26 August 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Rain
I love rain
Has anyone realized how beautiful rain is?
Each drop, making it's own courageous journey from the heavens,
Flying, gliding down to the scorched parched earth...
There is a saying - still water runs deep
There is no denying, it is calm up to a certain extent
Yet, at the bottom of it all, the fury of the torrents rage on
The perfect balance of things, or just a painful reality?
**********
As how someone i know used to go : "Saya tak gembira..."
Recently i seem to like that phrase very much as well...
Sometimes i really don't understand myself
On one hand, i am the eye of the storm
Yet, i'm the gale that surrounds it as well
**********
You know what the worst part of being away is?
The distance
The distance from things you hold true and dear
The distance from some of your childhood dreams
The distance from ideals and promises that you have held on your entire life
The distance from the familiar senses that make your day whole
The distance from the emotions that some may have tried to escape
The distance from the pillars that hold you up
The thought of being away....
**********
I'm here,
away...
I don't have much :
- a few dreams
- a small new family
- the excitement something new
- the spirit of a traveler
- believes
- faiths
- courage
- hopes
and yet...
I have everything
Lai Jian Wei
10.32pm
Wednesday 4th March 2009
Has anyone realized how beautiful rain is?
Each drop, making it's own courageous journey from the heavens,
Flying, gliding down to the scorched parched earth...
There is a saying - still water runs deep
There is no denying, it is calm up to a certain extent
Yet, at the bottom of it all, the fury of the torrents rage on
The perfect balance of things, or just a painful reality?
**********
As how someone i know used to go : "Saya tak gembira..."
Recently i seem to like that phrase very much as well...
Sometimes i really don't understand myself
On one hand, i am the eye of the storm
Yet, i'm the gale that surrounds it as well
**********
You know what the worst part of being away is?
The distance
The distance from things you hold true and dear
The distance from some of your childhood dreams
The distance from ideals and promises that you have held on your entire life
The distance from the familiar senses that make your day whole
The distance from the emotions that some may have tried to escape
The distance from the pillars that hold you up
The thought of being away....
**********
I'm here,
away...
I don't have much :
- a few dreams
- a small new family
- the excitement something new
- the spirit of a traveler
- believes
- faiths
- courage
- hopes
and yet...
I have everything
Lai Jian Wei
10.32pm
Wednesday 4th March 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Leaving...
Of late i realized something really interesting about myself - i've been putting off writing my blog for a long time adi... The last time i wrote was, well, before i left Brisbane. Now, i'm writing again. This time, will be before i go back to Brisbane.
Actually, throughout these few months, i have composed a few posts, just that i have never gotten around to finish writing them. The reason? Mood swings XD
But yala, throughout these few months i have been having a lot of ups and downs (please don't ask, don't really feel like talking about them). Currently my mood has reached the stage where i don't want to go back to Brisbane.... That is a long story la, to make it simple, let's just say being away then coming back made me realize i treasured a lot of things here and that the moment i go back to Aussie, i lose a lot of these things....
For a friend, yes you were right. I really really did enjoy myself back here in Malaysia. At the very least, i was distracted a lot by my darlings and friends a like. Sometimes i wonder, is it because i went overseas that i having a lot of attention from all my friends? Or is it just because i'm having a bout of really good jodoh this year? Haha... Either way, i'm not complaining. It's been a wonderful holiday for me (albeit the boredom of sitting alone at home doing nothing la...)
Friends are a wonderful thing. Somehow, they just have a knack of showing up at the right time and making problems miraculously disappear (for the moment at least) or just provide you with a dose of "healthy" distraction....
Most importantly, friends help you without they themselves or even you realizing it. It's a kind of abstract thing, not something you can grasp immediately after you read this or if that light bulb of inspiration flashes in your head. Speaking on this... Can i ask for a moment of silence for a friend, Yun Chi that passed away on the 5th of February...
...
...
...
...
...
Thank you
Like i was saying, she is a good example of this. Her passing, i believe has brought good a lot of people she once knew. Her passing was quite a sudden news to many of us, it just reflected on the fragility of life as we know it. At least for me, it made me realize that somethings are just unexpected. I'm sure many people have at some point in their lives, contemplated the fact "what would happen if suddenly my friend or a family member dies? Hmm..."
Contemplating and trying to prepare yourself mentally is one thing, when it actually happens, it is a totally different story all together... I admit, i'm not really very close to Yun Chi, but she is the first of my friends that has actually left us, forever... Her spirit may still be close to us, but she will always be an ethereal presence from now on... (haih...)
After paying my last respects, i was very angry for a moment. At myself. Why? I realized that i am a man surrounded by a lot of friends and i really mean A LOT. Yes, many of them i could say are casual acquaintances, some slightly better friends. Then of coz there are my darlings, beloveds and kids. And to think with so many people around me, i always complain i'm lonely. Worst still, i don't even bother keep in touch with many of these people. Only saying hi when i meet them and then have a few short sentences of a conversation and that's it.
As the anger slowly simmered off, sadness took it's place. It is very true the saying, "You may be best friends this year, very good friends the next year, close friends the following, and just acquaintances after that." When i look back, i do hold a lot of regrets, some of my once best friends when i see them today all i can bring out of me to say is just "hello" or "how have you been lately?" I do blame myself, but i also do realize that we just cannot have time for everybody as much as we try, as much as we want to...
Sad isn't it?
Lai Jian Wei
2.36pm
15 February 2009
Actually, throughout these few months, i have composed a few posts, just that i have never gotten around to finish writing them. The reason? Mood swings XD
But yala, throughout these few months i have been having a lot of ups and downs (please don't ask, don't really feel like talking about them). Currently my mood has reached the stage where i don't want to go back to Brisbane.... That is a long story la, to make it simple, let's just say being away then coming back made me realize i treasured a lot of things here and that the moment i go back to Aussie, i lose a lot of these things....
For a friend, yes you were right. I really really did enjoy myself back here in Malaysia. At the very least, i was distracted a lot by my darlings and friends a like. Sometimes i wonder, is it because i went overseas that i having a lot of attention from all my friends? Or is it just because i'm having a bout of really good jodoh this year? Haha... Either way, i'm not complaining. It's been a wonderful holiday for me (albeit the boredom of sitting alone at home doing nothing la...)
Friends are a wonderful thing. Somehow, they just have a knack of showing up at the right time and making problems miraculously disappear (for the moment at least) or just provide you with a dose of "healthy" distraction....
Most importantly, friends help you without they themselves or even you realizing it. It's a kind of abstract thing, not something you can grasp immediately after you read this or if that light bulb of inspiration flashes in your head. Speaking on this... Can i ask for a moment of silence for a friend, Yun Chi that passed away on the 5th of February...
...
...
...
...
...
Thank you
Like i was saying, she is a good example of this. Her passing, i believe has brought good a lot of people she once knew. Her passing was quite a sudden news to many of us, it just reflected on the fragility of life as we know it. At least for me, it made me realize that somethings are just unexpected. I'm sure many people have at some point in their lives, contemplated the fact "what would happen if suddenly my friend or a family member dies? Hmm..."
Contemplating and trying to prepare yourself mentally is one thing, when it actually happens, it is a totally different story all together... I admit, i'm not really very close to Yun Chi, but she is the first of my friends that has actually left us, forever... Her spirit may still be close to us, but she will always be an ethereal presence from now on... (haih...)
After paying my last respects, i was very angry for a moment. At myself. Why? I realized that i am a man surrounded by a lot of friends and i really mean A LOT. Yes, many of them i could say are casual acquaintances, some slightly better friends. Then of coz there are my darlings, beloveds and kids. And to think with so many people around me, i always complain i'm lonely. Worst still, i don't even bother keep in touch with many of these people. Only saying hi when i meet them and then have a few short sentences of a conversation and that's it.
As the anger slowly simmered off, sadness took it's place. It is very true the saying, "You may be best friends this year, very good friends the next year, close friends the following, and just acquaintances after that." When i look back, i do hold a lot of regrets, some of my once best friends when i see them today all i can bring out of me to say is just "hello" or "how have you been lately?" I do blame myself, but i also do realize that we just cannot have time for everybody as much as we try, as much as we want to...
Sad isn't it?
Lai Jian Wei
2.36pm
15 February 2009
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Today is a cloudy day....
Today is a cloudy day in Brisbane, and it is REALLY cloudy.... Not too mention cold(ughhh)....
I got up this morning cranky, depressed and sad.... The reason? Because i stopped being a vegetarian that's why. How many people still know what i mean by being vegetarian?
Some things in life are never easy. They take a lot of courage, determination and dedication. Me stopping to be a vegetarian is one of these things. And i had to choose one of the hardest dishes in the world to try and cook.
First of all, collecting ingredients is hard. Next the amount of skill required to cook is phenomenal. As of now i still have not found any reference materials or recipes. I'm doing this blindly, hoping that it will go right, praying lady luck is on my side. Lastly, for this dish to truly come out prefect and nice, i need divine intervention (a.k.a. The People Upstairs on my side).
I'm pretty sure some people will be going OMG now and wishing me best of luck etc. Let's just say, if i put the story down properly, people might be fainting this very moment. Similarly, many people might ask me, "If it's so hard and might not even work out in the end, why try in the first place?"
Answer is simple, if you want good food, of cause you must try and cook it right? I am the type of person that loves good food. Anyone that knows me long enough can bear witness to that, Plus plus, people are going to be very happy if this succeeds.
Enough of the cooking, anyway coming back.....
I got up being cranky and depressed. I hate it when that used to happen. I would be unable to study for the whole day and be extremely snappy towards people for the rest of the day. The worst part is, it somehow has a way of carrying itself over days at end. Making people so afraid of me for days and days.
"Oh sh*t" was the first thought i had when i woke up. I figured I'm going to have a lousy day ahead, not to mention my exams are just a few days away and i still need to study. Lunch certainly didn't go well either, spent an entire lunch not talking much. Talking so little until one of my friends went "Lai, say something already!!"
But, today I realized how much i have grown up.... I stayed focused, yay!! I shoved all my sorrow and depression aside and just put my heart down to study. Not only did i manage to a substantial amount of work done, that distraction cheered me up and made me realize that the problems i thought i had were not that big after all....
Now, I am a cheerful man. Ready to face up again to the daunting tasks before me, ready to take up that responsibility, ready to give it all my best again.
I am at peace with myself again.....
Lai Jian Wei
5.17pm
Sunday, 9th November 2008
p/s : you know something? I really feel like watching Lilo & Stitch now... Huh... But have to study la...
I got up this morning cranky, depressed and sad.... The reason? Because i stopped being a vegetarian that's why. How many people still know what i mean by being vegetarian?
Some things in life are never easy. They take a lot of courage, determination and dedication. Me stopping to be a vegetarian is one of these things. And i had to choose one of the hardest dishes in the world to try and cook.
First of all, collecting ingredients is hard. Next the amount of skill required to cook is phenomenal. As of now i still have not found any reference materials or recipes. I'm doing this blindly, hoping that it will go right, praying lady luck is on my side. Lastly, for this dish to truly come out prefect and nice, i need divine intervention (a.k.a. The People Upstairs on my side).
I'm pretty sure some people will be going OMG now and wishing me best of luck etc. Let's just say, if i put the story down properly, people might be fainting this very moment. Similarly, many people might ask me, "If it's so hard and might not even work out in the end, why try in the first place?"
Answer is simple, if you want good food, of cause you must try and cook it right? I am the type of person that loves good food. Anyone that knows me long enough can bear witness to that, Plus plus, people are going to be very happy if this succeeds.
Enough of the cooking, anyway coming back.....
I got up being cranky and depressed. I hate it when that used to happen. I would be unable to study for the whole day and be extremely snappy towards people for the rest of the day. The worst part is, it somehow has a way of carrying itself over days at end. Making people so afraid of me for days and days.
"Oh sh*t" was the first thought i had when i woke up. I figured I'm going to have a lousy day ahead, not to mention my exams are just a few days away and i still need to study. Lunch certainly didn't go well either, spent an entire lunch not talking much. Talking so little until one of my friends went "Lai, say something already!!"
But, today I realized how much i have grown up.... I stayed focused, yay!! I shoved all my sorrow and depression aside and just put my heart down to study. Not only did i manage to a substantial amount of work done, that distraction cheered me up and made me realize that the problems i thought i had were not that big after all....
Now, I am a cheerful man. Ready to face up again to the daunting tasks before me, ready to take up that responsibility, ready to give it all my best again.
I am at peace with myself again.....
Lai Jian Wei
5.17pm
Sunday, 9th November 2008
p/s : you know something? I really feel like watching Lilo & Stitch now... Huh... But have to study la...
Saturday, October 18, 2008
2 Months & 15 Days....
2 months & 15 days...
What about it?
That was my last blog entry.
In this period of time, some many things have happened. For one i made a lot of really great friends here already. Then at the same time, my semester is coming to an end now, i have a lot of assignments to finish as well as prepare for my finals. I am very nervous, after all I am in another country, not my own.
But the main reason for me being nervous is because of the subject I'm taking, Environmental Science. Why? Because i really really enjoy what I am learning. I really want to do well. I still remember telling my family and friends, if I am allowed to do something i really like, i will be able to excel in it. When i came over, everyone told me that i will do well. I'm now in a culture and setting that is more open to my style of study and more importantly I'm doing a topic which i truly have passion for.
Frankly, looking at how I'm coping so far, I am doing rather well. But some how i feel it is not enough. Yes, I'm getting High Distinctions (someone wants to kill me know when she finds out I'm saying this) but somehow I myself am not satisfied with my own performance. When i read my assignments and essays, i feel they nothing more than a beautiful orchestra of words that have no substance in it. Yet, when i receive it back, i get a compliment from my tutor on on a good job which i don't really feel i deserved very much.
Anyway...
On other matters, in this period my parents had also paid me a visit. For once in my life, I think I was really really happy to see them. Although I admit I'm not especially close with my parents, but seeing them for that few days really did cheer me up a lot. I guess is the reality of not having them by my side was getting to me. Initially, I would get very annoyed because i was not at home. I would want something to use (scissors for example) and suddenly realize that I was not at home and did not have them.
I think this is what they mean by becoming independent and looking after yourself. Time to grow up~~ Haha... Eh, but i must admit though, it has been a really interesting experience. I actually learned how to do a lot of shopping on my own, how to look for better products and settle issues with the bank etc. I am also very very grateful to my parents. Why? From young they made me do a lot of the things around the house and I used to be so annoyed by it. Now I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so happy because of that. I can do every chore that there is. I can even cook better than a lot of people here. =D
Coming back to friends....
I miss my darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok... Done screaming, now can talk adi.... I have been calling back some of my friends in Malaysia. Similarly, i have never been so happy to hear their voice and to be able to talk to them. My friends as well, damn funny la, i still remember one of them screaming "Jian Wei!!!!! So happy!!!!" and some others picking up the phone and being so polite going "Hello, may i know who is this?" which actually scared me. I never thought they could be so polite.
I miss the times that which come out and yum cha. I still have issues talking over IM and the phone la. I need to talk to people face to face to really be able to express myself. I also feel a more personal connection when talking like that. I can relate to them more. This has something to do with the body language. If i remember my number correctly, about 70 - 80% of communication is done subconsciously as body language. The rest of the communication is done by words. This is one reason i don't like to use SMS and chat to talk with people. Twice here in Australia i have upset a good friend due to misunderstanding in SMS and MSN. I'm really really sorry.... =(
Coming on to my friends in Australia, i meet some really great people. Not to mention we do a lot of silly things. Like playing computer over the college LAN network until 3am. We also have a lot of fun time debating over funny issues and talk random things. But two of them are on exchange and will be going back after this semester is over.... Feeling a bit sad thinking of it already. They have been great and wonderful friends all throughout these few months. Really hope i can visit them some day after they have gone back to their home countries.
But like my style back in Malaysia, if i don't want to talk, there is nothing anyone can do about it. This i think has caused me to have a lot less friends that i would have had. Oh well, people who know we probably expected that already. But I'm not in a rush to have a lot of friends. I like to take my time, and make really really high quality friends as i like to put it. =)
There is one last thing I'll touch on this post, however i can't really share much about it. But for the people that know about it, take it as an update on what is happening.
The last blog post was roughly the beginning of it. Over these 10 weeks, so many different things have happened. I have had ups, downs, depression bouts, joy bouts, periods of total exhaustion, and periods of extreme energy.
Soon I'll be taking a break though when i go back to Malaysia. I'm having mixed feelings at the moment, not really sure how i feel. But all I want to do now is to have faith, try my best and wait and see =)
Anyway, it is now 11.40am here. Soon those chibi (Japanese word i learned) will be calling me out for lunch so i think I'll finish this post here. Yes yes, i know, there are still 2 posts i owe you people. But this period i am really very very strained for time.
Actually la, the main reason I'm writing this post is to cheer myself up a bit. Was a bit depressed and frustrated over the past few days. Now that I'm almost done writing i feel A LOT better already.
Take care people.
Will meet those back in Malaysia real soon....
Lai Jian Wei
11.43am
18 October 2008
What about it?
That was my last blog entry.
In this period of time, some many things have happened. For one i made a lot of really great friends here already. Then at the same time, my semester is coming to an end now, i have a lot of assignments to finish as well as prepare for my finals. I am very nervous, after all I am in another country, not my own.
But the main reason for me being nervous is because of the subject I'm taking, Environmental Science. Why? Because i really really enjoy what I am learning. I really want to do well. I still remember telling my family and friends, if I am allowed to do something i really like, i will be able to excel in it. When i came over, everyone told me that i will do well. I'm now in a culture and setting that is more open to my style of study and more importantly I'm doing a topic which i truly have passion for.
Frankly, looking at how I'm coping so far, I am doing rather well. But some how i feel it is not enough. Yes, I'm getting High Distinctions (someone wants to kill me know when she finds out I'm saying this) but somehow I myself am not satisfied with my own performance. When i read my assignments and essays, i feel they nothing more than a beautiful orchestra of words that have no substance in it. Yet, when i receive it back, i get a compliment from my tutor on on a good job which i don't really feel i deserved very much.
Anyway...
On other matters, in this period my parents had also paid me a visit. For once in my life, I think I was really really happy to see them. Although I admit I'm not especially close with my parents, but seeing them for that few days really did cheer me up a lot. I guess is the reality of not having them by my side was getting to me. Initially, I would get very annoyed because i was not at home. I would want something to use (scissors for example) and suddenly realize that I was not at home and did not have them.
I think this is what they mean by becoming independent and looking after yourself. Time to grow up~~ Haha... Eh, but i must admit though, it has been a really interesting experience. I actually learned how to do a lot of shopping on my own, how to look for better products and settle issues with the bank etc. I am also very very grateful to my parents. Why? From young they made me do a lot of the things around the house and I used to be so annoyed by it. Now I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so happy because of that. I can do every chore that there is. I can even cook better than a lot of people here. =D
Coming back to friends....
I miss my darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok... Done screaming, now can talk adi.... I have been calling back some of my friends in Malaysia. Similarly, i have never been so happy to hear their voice and to be able to talk to them. My friends as well, damn funny la, i still remember one of them screaming "Jian Wei!!!!! So happy!!!!" and some others picking up the phone and being so polite going "Hello, may i know who is this?" which actually scared me. I never thought they could be so polite.
I miss the times that which come out and yum cha. I still have issues talking over IM and the phone la. I need to talk to people face to face to really be able to express myself. I also feel a more personal connection when talking like that. I can relate to them more. This has something to do with the body language. If i remember my number correctly, about 70 - 80% of communication is done subconsciously as body language. The rest of the communication is done by words. This is one reason i don't like to use SMS and chat to talk with people. Twice here in Australia i have upset a good friend due to misunderstanding in SMS and MSN. I'm really really sorry.... =(
Coming on to my friends in Australia, i meet some really great people. Not to mention we do a lot of silly things. Like playing computer over the college LAN network until 3am. We also have a lot of fun time debating over funny issues and talk random things. But two of them are on exchange and will be going back after this semester is over.... Feeling a bit sad thinking of it already. They have been great and wonderful friends all throughout these few months. Really hope i can visit them some day after they have gone back to their home countries.
But like my style back in Malaysia, if i don't want to talk, there is nothing anyone can do about it. This i think has caused me to have a lot less friends that i would have had. Oh well, people who know we probably expected that already. But I'm not in a rush to have a lot of friends. I like to take my time, and make really really high quality friends as i like to put it. =)
There is one last thing I'll touch on this post, however i can't really share much about it. But for the people that know about it, take it as an update on what is happening.
The last blog post was roughly the beginning of it. Over these 10 weeks, so many different things have happened. I have had ups, downs, depression bouts, joy bouts, periods of total exhaustion, and periods of extreme energy.
Soon I'll be taking a break though when i go back to Malaysia. I'm having mixed feelings at the moment, not really sure how i feel. But all I want to do now is to have faith, try my best and wait and see =)
Anyway, it is now 11.40am here. Soon those chibi (Japanese word i learned) will be calling me out for lunch so i think I'll finish this post here. Yes yes, i know, there are still 2 posts i owe you people. But this period i am really very very strained for time.
Actually la, the main reason I'm writing this post is to cheer myself up a bit. Was a bit depressed and frustrated over the past few days. Now that I'm almost done writing i feel A LOT better already.
Take care people.
Will meet those back in Malaysia real soon....
Lai Jian Wei
11.43am
18 October 2008
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Gold Coast & A Second Step (Part I)
Saturday August 2, 2008 was my happiest day in Australia yet. Also one of my happiest days in my life as of now.
The day began early when i woke up about slightly past 6. We were going to Gold Coast!!!
Our morning started out anything but planned. All our plans went haywire. We were supposed to meet up with most of our group including our organizer and take a bus from our university campus to nearby Garden City (a shopping complex) to meet up with the rest of our group.
Then Andrew (our organizer) called us in the morning and told us to wait at university for them to arrive. It was a "arrggghhhh" moment for one of us who stayed on campus (introducing Jia Yao, from China). He had already cooked a bowl of instant noodles to eat (he was agitated cause me and him have our food catered for and we had paid for the catered breakfast already). I also had to quickly run down to the campus bus stop to find Ivy (a young lady from Taiwan) who was waiting for us at the bus stop.
But Jia Yao would be very thankful he had eaten breakfast (i hadn't mind you) cause after a bit of clarification and discussion, we who were on the campus had to rush back over to Garden City to meet up with Andrew and the rest of our entourage. Me, Jia Yao & Ivy then started waiting for our bus which was supposed to come at 7.34am. But no~~ The bus never came and we had already waited for more than half an hour. Mind you, i was really disappointed. I had been so impressed with Queensland's public transport system. It was overall punctual to the minute in most cases for me except this time. Grrr.....
In the end at about 8am, Andrew called and asked us to wait at the university for them to come. They had ironed out most of details of our journey and we could catch our required bus from the university.
Jia Yao's thankfulness turned into sorrow (okla, not that bad la) coz we could now eat breakfast in the hostel dining as breakfast time had started. But as we half way through our breakfast, Andrew called to say they had arrived but they were in the adjacent campus (oh shit, i just remembered, i still haven't done the post on my Uni yet). So we rushed through our breakfast and walked to the adjacent campus which was half an hour's walk away.
On arrival, we meet up at the University Busway (it's some kind of bus stop, i'll explain more in the uni post). There along with Andrew was Jessica (remember the Indon from an earlier post?), Pablo (from Columbia) and Jeff (from China). After a short intro, we hopped onto our bus.
Now before i came to Australia, i have been warned that there is a certain amount of racism towards Asians here. However since i arrived, i have not encountered a single case of such until now.
This bus drive really tak syok us Asians. Why? First of all he was being a pain in the a** in his talking. Next he also charged us daily fares. It was a Saturday, the fares on Saturday are known as Off-Peak and are thus cheaper but i suspect he deliberately charged us more. He was also being very rude to another passanger which was an Asian. But i don't want to a pain in the butt myself and continue complaining about this fellow.
Anyway, we got off at Altandi Rail Station. There we met the last member of our group, Samantha from China.
To my darlings, as usual, the start of our journey. In everyone is in this photo except me and Andrew who are holding the cameras.
Well, here are the names, from left:
Jia Yao, Ivy, Pablo, Jeff, Samantha & Jessica
Satisfied? I'm very sure people are going ask me who is who later so i might as well do the introduction now.
Then how about this photo? The one of the train tracks? Today was also one of the first field trips for my camera. I really put it to good use and got some really great shots for this trip. Later I'll show em. I'm quite proud of this except for the stupid car, which i couldn't get out of the frame. Oh well...
Well, the wait for the train was quite cold i could say. We hadn't really warmed up with each other yet. Everyone in this trip was only directly connected to Andrew, the rest of us had to do a re-introduction among each other to get each other better.
In the train, things got better. We became more chatty. Getting into and writing down details of conversation is not really my style so i won't do it. Too bad.
We disembarked next at Beenleigh Station which was the last station for the Brisbane line of the train tracks. We then got onto the Gold Coast line and went all the way down~~~
Now on this train, me and Jessica became more acquainted with a couple of Koreans we met earlier. They came to us and started talking. They were from Korea and were here for 5 weeks as a summer exchange program. Like us, they were en route to Gold Coast. There they will meet up with some of the Korea friends that were already in Australia. And here are they.....
In this photo be Hee-Eun and the 2 of us. In this next photo is Kwang-Hee. Please don't comment about my pose. I can see it myself. This is why i don't like taking photos of myself.
We kept on talking to them until we arrived in Nerang Station in Gold Coast. There Hee-Eun and Kwang-Hee met up with their own friends and we bid each other goodbye. They were a friendly bunch. It was a nice experience talking with thme.
When we walked out of Nerang Station and towards the bus stop. All i could say was ********(censored due to the fact i have young people reading this). The line for the bus was so loooooooooooooooooooong. In fact everyone in the line didn't fit into one bus. So we and everyone else behind us had to wait for the next bus.
Now, when we were waiting for the next bus, we exchanged ghost stories with Pablo. He gave us
a fair share of Columbian and South American ghost stories. Whilst me and Jessica were telling him about SE-Asian ones. Dou kei-s, i got more stories adi XD
Oh, i think i haven't mentioned out weather for the day yet. Just take a look yourself ---->
We took the next bus that came along and went to Pacific Fair - one of the biggest and most famous shopping centers in Gold Coast and i mean big. Most of it is open air in streets with a lot of shops along the streets. Sorry to say i was lazy at this time to pull out my camera so i don't have any shots of here. The crowd wasn't very big, and the shops here sold a lot of clothes especially beachwear.
I will admit, after 3 weeks of western food (with the exception of my relatives' cooking) i was dying for some Asian food. ESPECIALLY MY BELOVED NASI LEMAK!!!!
By now we had broken into 2 smaller groups. One group, me along with Jessica, Pablo, Ivy and Jia Yao had gotten too hungry and we decided to go and get lunch. Andrew, Jeff and Samantha wanted to walk around before eating.
Now this photo, is a photo of the ceiling above the food court where we decided to take our lunch. This photo in my opinion truly shows the capability of my baby (Canon Powershot G9). If you looked at it in fully size, you can really see the detail and colour jump out at you. Anyway, coming back.....
My first course of action was to look for a Malaysian or Singaporean stall. Sadly, tarak T.T
I settled with eating mixed rice, Chinese style.
The mixed rice here works in funny ways. We paid $10.80 for a plate and we can take as much as we want. But too bad most of the food, despite being Chinese, was still very western in flavour and style of cooking.
Over the course of lunch, we took the pleasure of disgusting Pablo. With what? The disgusting appetite of Chinese - of what they eat and how they eat it(very gruesome, not appropriate for minors =P) also the cruel acts humans do towards the other animals of the world.
I just remembered i forgot to do something - ask Pablo about the food. Coming from Columbia, this was his first taste of Chinese food.
After lunch we went walking around Pacific Fair. As we walked we slowly dispersed. In the end it was me, Jessica and Pablo walking together. We walked and walked then i saw it.
I walked into the shop and i was "wah!". I was in a Kathmandu specialty shop. Kathmandu is a very famous company that produces thermal wear and outdoor equipment. I just browsed around and cried in my heart. The things were so good.... Their prices even prettier.... I was hoping to get an outer shell and was surveying the prices. Buying one would essentially cost me half of the money i had brought along to Australia.
Anyway, when the meeting time came . We gathered back and took a bus to.....
Just in case you can't read the sign board, it says "Surfers Paradise"
Before we go on, have a look at the picture on the right.
Can you guess?
Yep, it's the Rainbow Lorikeet i mentioned earlier. Cute eh?
Moving on, here i was, in Surfer's Paradise. One of the best beaches in the world. And i truly truly agree with that common opinion.
You know how people grade sand in a beach? It is also how they grade how good the beach is. The less the sand sticks to your feet, the better it it. And man is the sand here fine. Using your hands, you can brush your feet totally clean of sand. The only other time i had felt sand that could at least match it was in Redang Island.
Yesh, stop screaming already. I know. Feast your eyes :-D
The clear blue sea.... The water so nice and cool.... And the sound of the waves.....
The beach is just so long.....
..... So long.... As far as the eye can see.....
Now here, i must thank my brother who first gave me the inspirations to take such photos (as the following) and one of my beloved darlings who has helped me take so many of them....
But....
Now there is someone that is helping you do your job. She does a very good job of it also. This was the photo she took with the least guidance and after i slowly look through all my photos, this one turned out to be the best. I sangat bangga dekat dia.... Haha....
And more photos~~
This photo i call it "Ball in the Surf"
It looks like the girl is black is running to save the lady in the sea right? A good teaser. They don't even know each other and what they are both doing are not related at all. That's why you can't believe everything you see in photos.
Here are a group of Japanese. Now i know why one of my friends love these sort of photos.
Well, here is one last group pic. The guy in the far right is Andrew. Shortly after taking this photo, Andrew, Jeff and Samantha left and went back early. They had to do some shopping in the city. Oh well... Disappointed, but what could we do? The remainder of us stayed back for Part II of the journey.
The day began early when i woke up about slightly past 6. We were going to Gold Coast!!!
Our morning started out anything but planned. All our plans went haywire. We were supposed to meet up with most of our group including our organizer and take a bus from our university campus to nearby Garden City (a shopping complex) to meet up with the rest of our group.
Then Andrew (our organizer) called us in the morning and told us to wait at university for them to arrive. It was a "arrggghhhh" moment for one of us who stayed on campus (introducing Jia Yao, from China). He had already cooked a bowl of instant noodles to eat (he was agitated cause me and him have our food catered for and we had paid for the catered breakfast already). I also had to quickly run down to the campus bus stop to find Ivy (a young lady from Taiwan) who was waiting for us at the bus stop.
But Jia Yao would be very thankful he had eaten breakfast (i hadn't mind you) cause after a bit of clarification and discussion, we who were on the campus had to rush back over to Garden City to meet up with Andrew and the rest of our entourage. Me, Jia Yao & Ivy then started waiting for our bus which was supposed to come at 7.34am. But no~~ The bus never came and we had already waited for more than half an hour. Mind you, i was really disappointed. I had been so impressed with Queensland's public transport system. It was overall punctual to the minute in most cases for me except this time. Grrr.....
In the end at about 8am, Andrew called and asked us to wait at the university for them to come. They had ironed out most of details of our journey and we could catch our required bus from the university.
Jia Yao's thankfulness turned into sorrow (okla, not that bad la) coz we could now eat breakfast in the hostel dining as breakfast time had started. But as we half way through our breakfast, Andrew called to say they had arrived but they were in the adjacent campus (oh shit, i just remembered, i still haven't done the post on my Uni yet). So we rushed through our breakfast and walked to the adjacent campus which was half an hour's walk away.
On arrival, we meet up at the University Busway (it's some kind of bus stop, i'll explain more in the uni post). There along with Andrew was Jessica (remember the Indon from an earlier post?), Pablo (from Columbia) and Jeff (from China). After a short intro, we hopped onto our bus.
Now before i came to Australia, i have been warned that there is a certain amount of racism towards Asians here. However since i arrived, i have not encountered a single case of such until now.
This bus drive really tak syok us Asians. Why? First of all he was being a pain in the a** in his talking. Next he also charged us daily fares. It was a Saturday, the fares on Saturday are known as Off-Peak and are thus cheaper but i suspect he deliberately charged us more. He was also being very rude to another passanger which was an Asian. But i don't want to a pain in the butt myself and continue complaining about this fellow.
Anyway, we got off at Altandi Rail Station. There we met the last member of our group, Samantha from China.To my darlings, as usual, the start of our journey. In everyone is in this photo except me and Andrew who are holding the cameras.
Well, here are the names, from left:
Jia Yao, Ivy, Pablo, Jeff, Samantha & Jessica
Satisfied? I'm very sure people are going ask me who is who later so i might as well do the introduction now.
Then how about this photo? The one of the train tracks? Today was also one of the first field trips for my camera. I really put it to good use and got some really great shots for this trip. Later I'll show em. I'm quite proud of this except for the stupid car, which i couldn't get out of the frame. Oh well...Well, the wait for the train was quite cold i could say. We hadn't really warmed up with each other yet. Everyone in this trip was only directly connected to Andrew, the rest of us had to do a re-introduction among each other to get each other better.
In the train, things got better. We became more chatty. Getting into and writing down details of conversation is not really my style so i won't do it. Too bad.
We disembarked next at Beenleigh Station which was the last station for the Brisbane line of the train tracks. We then got onto the Gold Coast line and went all the way down~~~
Now on this train, me and Jessica became more acquainted with a couple of Koreans we met earlier. They came to us and started talking. They were from Korea and were here for 5 weeks as a summer exchange program. Like us, they were en route to Gold Coast. There they will meet up with some of the Korea friends that were already in Australia. And here are they.....
In this photo be Hee-Eun and the 2 of us. In this next photo is Kwang-Hee. Please don't comment about my pose. I can see it myself. This is why i don't like taking photos of myself.
We kept on talking to them until we arrived in Nerang Station in Gold Coast. There Hee-Eun and Kwang-Hee met up with their own friends and we bid each other goodbye. They were a friendly bunch. It was a nice experience talking with thme.
When we walked out of Nerang Station and towards the bus stop. All i could say was ********(censored due to the fact i have young people reading this). The line for the bus was so loooooooooooooooooooong. In fact everyone in the line didn't fit into one bus. So we and everyone else behind us had to wait for the next bus.
Now, when we were waiting for the next bus, we exchanged ghost stories with Pablo. He gave us
a fair share of Columbian and South American ghost stories. Whilst me and Jessica were telling him about SE-Asian ones. Dou kei-s, i got more stories adi XDOh, i think i haven't mentioned out weather for the day yet. Just take a look yourself ---->
We took the next bus that came along and went to Pacific Fair - one of the biggest and most famous shopping centers in Gold Coast and i mean big. Most of it is open air in streets with a lot of shops along the streets. Sorry to say i was lazy at this time to pull out my camera so i don't have any shots of here. The crowd wasn't very big, and the shops here sold a lot of clothes especially beachwear.
I will admit, after 3 weeks of western food (with the exception of my relatives' cooking) i was dying for some Asian food. ESPECIALLY MY BELOVED NASI LEMAK!!!!By now we had broken into 2 smaller groups. One group, me along with Jessica, Pablo, Ivy and Jia Yao had gotten too hungry and we decided to go and get lunch. Andrew, Jeff and Samantha wanted to walk around before eating.
Now this photo, is a photo of the ceiling above the food court where we decided to take our lunch. This photo in my opinion truly shows the capability of my baby (Canon Powershot G9). If you looked at it in fully size, you can really see the detail and colour jump out at you. Anyway, coming back.....
My first course of action was to look for a Malaysian or Singaporean stall. Sadly, tarak T.T
I settled with eating mixed rice, Chinese style.
The mixed rice here works in funny ways. We paid $10.80 for a plate and we can take as much as we want. But too bad most of the food, despite being Chinese, was still very western in flavour and style of cooking.
Over the course of lunch, we took the pleasure of disgusting Pablo. With what? The disgusting appetite of Chinese - of what they eat and how they eat it(very gruesome, not appropriate for minors =P) also the cruel acts humans do towards the other animals of the world.
I just remembered i forgot to do something - ask Pablo about the food. Coming from Columbia, this was his first taste of Chinese food.
After lunch we went walking around Pacific Fair. As we walked we slowly dispersed. In the end it was me, Jessica and Pablo walking together. We walked and walked then i saw it.
I walked into the shop and i was "wah!". I was in a Kathmandu specialty shop. Kathmandu is a very famous company that produces thermal wear and outdoor equipment. I just browsed around and cried in my heart. The things were so good.... Their prices even prettier.... I was hoping to get an outer shell and was surveying the prices. Buying one would essentially cost me half of the money i had brought along to Australia.
Anyway, when the meeting time came . We gathered back and took a bus to.....
Just in case you can't read the sign board, it says "Surfers Paradise"
Before we go on, have a look at the picture on the right.Can you guess?
Yep, it's the Rainbow Lorikeet i mentioned earlier. Cute eh?
Moving on, here i was, in Surfer's Paradise. One of the best beaches in the world. And i truly truly agree with that common opinion.
You know how people grade sand in a beach? It is also how they grade how good the beach is. The less the sand sticks to your feet, the better it it. And man is the sand here fine. Using your hands, you can brush your feet totally clean of sand. The only other time i had felt sand that could at least match it was in Redang Island.
Yesh, stop screaming already. I know. Feast your eyes :-D
The clear blue sea.... The water so nice and cool.... And the sound of the waves.....
The beach is just so long.....
..... So long.... As far as the eye can see.....Now here, i must thank my brother who first gave me the inspirations to take such photos (as the following) and one of my beloved darlings who has helped me take so many of them....
But....
Now there is someone that is helping you do your job. She does a very good job of it also. This was the photo she took with the least guidance and after i slowly look through all my photos, this one turned out to be the best. I sangat bangga dekat dia.... Haha....And more photos~~
This photo i call it "Ball in the Surf"
It looks like the girl is black is running to save the lady in the sea right? A good teaser. They don't even know each other and what they are both doing are not related at all. That's why you can't believe everything you see in photos.
Here are a group of Japanese. Now i know why one of my friends love these sort of photos.
Well, here is one last group pic. The guy in the far right is Andrew. Shortly after taking this photo, Andrew, Jeff and Samantha left and went back early. They had to do some shopping in the city. Oh well... Disappointed, but what could we do? The remainder of us stayed back for Part II of the journey.Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Bushwalking
Being extremely free the last weekend (26 July), i took a morning and went bushwalking.My destination??
<----- Mt Gravatt in Toohey Forest.
This post is mainly a photo post, just enjoy the green and the scenery. Bit disappointed though, cause i didn't get many good photos...
However...
There were 2 big highlights of the day :
1. I was chased by a turkey.I'm pretty sure most of you'll are going either "Huh?" or "What?" and will most likely be laughing your butts off after reading that sentence.
Anyway, i was chased by a Bush Turkey. And if you're wondering where are it's photos, i can say i was too busy trying to get away from it. (How does a bush turkey look? Check back one of my old posts. There's a photo there)
Actually I'm not very sure if it was chasing me at all. But I'm pretty sure it was. It all started when i was walking down one of the trails when i noticed this turkey in the bushes.
Well, i see them pretty often so i just ignored. Then suddenly i charged at me. I guess it was some sort of surprise attack and yes, it did surprise me very much.
Then i did what usually works in Malaysia for scaring off animals, stomping my foot and going "shoo!" It did help a little. It would just back off for a little bit.The scary part was, everytime i turned my back and started walking off. It would chase and follow. For every step i took, it in turn would take 2 steps (Hey, it's smaller ok?). Naturally i was spooked. I tried chasing it off a few times but it kept coming back. At one stage i just became so pissed and evil, i just wanted nothing more than to give it a good kick in the face (oh yeah~~) but I'm Lai Jian Wei la, please, i don't do such things.
After a while, i started sending out mental messages to the bird (yes it sounds stupid, but i seriously didn't feel like hurting the bird) " don't force me, or i am really going give you a good kick in the butt" In the end it did work (thankfully) and the ******* stopped following me. (*sighs in relief*)
Before i go on, the city you see in the photos? That is Brisbane city, seen from the peak of Mt Gravatt.
And this shiny area near the horizon? That's Moreton Bay. Beyond that is Moreton Island, one of my target destinations. XD
Anyway, here's the second interesting event...For all my peers and the slightly older friends, I'm pretty sure you have read the poem "The Road Not Taken" by Robert Frost. For my kids, just go and find a Form 5 Literature Book then you can read the poem or just go and Google the poem.
I must say this poem has really inspired me in many ways. It also is very like me. I don't like to do what everyone does.
As i was walking around Mt Gravatt, there were many choice of trails. There was this point i reached a fork in the trail. And as the poem goes,
"Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear:
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,"
I took the path that was less travelled, had more grass, was more cramped....
And got lost.
Why? I made one of the most stupid mistakes. I can't believe i forgot to do this.
To all my kids, please please please don't forget this when you'll go jungle trekking. Always look back. Sometimes when you look in front, you think you see a trail but in reality it might not be one. The best way to check if you are really on a trail is to look back. Once you check and you cannot see a trail anymore, quickly turn back.
The reason i couldn't turn back was i forged a trail on my own for more than 5mins. When i finally discovered something wrong and look back, i had already lost my bearings and certainly the trail. As i was climbing, i became overly engrossed in my surroundings and forgot to check.
I will admit that i was EXTREMELY scared. Why? Not because i was lost, but because of the landscape. That day was a nice hot sunny day. The landscape had a lot of fallen logs and thick shrub. And do you know why these factors made me scared?
Snakes.
Australia has 9 of 10 most deadly snakes in the world. And i was stuck in the middle of bushland - prime snake territory. I tread very very lightly. The terrain certainly didn't help. It was full of good snake hiding places. Not to mention spiders. If i was bitten you certainly wouldn't be reading this entry now.
Anyway, since you are reading this i did make it out alive. How did i get out? Well, it wasn't that hard actually. Since i was on the slope of the mountain, i decided a forge a trail straight up. After all there was a lookout point on the peak. After about 15mins of pushing through dead fallen branches and shrubs, i reached a trail just below the mountain's peak.
It was fun all in all. Getting lost and being chased. But i can't stop stressing my friends and kids, please always go out prepared bring water and anything you might need etc. Also inform somebody where you are going and what time you should expect to get back.
Stick to clear well cut trails. I was lucky in a sense that the forest was small, so if i just kept of walking i would sooner or later find a way out. But please don't be like me and go do silly things. Silly things should be left to crazy people like me.
=D
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Relatives, Moving, Australians, Malaysians
It's been quite a while since i last made a post. Anyway, I'm just taking a break from my form 6 story for the time being. Sorry to one of my kids, coz i haven't written the section of the story down yet. Well, in the meantime, let me just tell you'll about my past few days in Australia.
First of all, on Saturday, i went to my Granduncle & Grandaunty's house. It was very very nice of them, they came all the way across Brisbane to fetch me to their place, which by car, took about half an hour (it was a weekend, the traffic was wonderful, i can't imagine on a working day =S)
Well, their house is, how do i put it? Very beautiful. Especially the garden. I also regretted not taking any photographs, damn it la... The next time i visit their place i am definitely going to take some photos of their place.
Their house is near a forest reserve also. In the immediate area there are a lot and i mean A LOT of birds. More than what i get on campus. They also have birds such as cockatoos and many other birds from the same family in addition to all the common birds. They have a creek flowing nearby which according to the locals have platypuses in the waters, very very rare though. According to my granduncle, there have also been sightings of kangaroos in the area once but have since stopped.
They treated me very well there. Most of the meals i had were Malaysian (yay!). They also had a dog, a white one and i can't remember the breed thought. It was cute, furry, bouncy, and spoiled. Haha... She was fun to play with, by the way, her name is Whisky. She's very old though, 12 years and getting slightly blind.
They also brought me sight-seeing a bit at nearby Mount Cootha. Spectacular sight of Brisbane. I was also taken on a tour to my "rival" university, the one which i couldn't go due to my results, University of Queensland which is colossal. I thought my university was already huge. Here was just... You really need a bicycle to travel around.
On Sunday, they sent me all the way back to the campus again... They're so nice i feel very paiseh leh... They also gave me some food for me to keep, a can of peanuts, a box of muesli bars and a bottle of acar(there's more about the bottle of acar).
On Sunday itself, i had to move over to my permanent accommodation in the neighbouring campus. Here, the rooms are bigger and there are a lot more closets. So far, the neighbours here are more civic minded, not to mention quite a few of them are a lot friendlier than in the previous campus.
Well, I've pretty much unpacked already if you are wondering. If there's one thing i like about this place, it is the fact that it is quieter than the previous college (like i said, more civic conscious). My room is on the 5th floor facing away from the university. I get a pretty good view of some of the Brisbane suburbs as well as the distant mountains. Too bad my windows are so damn dirty that i can't take a photo to show you'll.
Another annoying thing about this place, is there is no place for you to hang out your clothes. Yes, they have dryers, but frankly, i don't like the smell of the clothes after they come out of the dryers. This is the time i was happy i packed along one of my scout strings. I'm going to pull up a clothes line in my room. XD
Like i was saying, the people here are much friendlier. Well, yesterday i was asked out to join some of the current students to go for a movie. I accepted, and went to watch Batman. We left the college at about 5pm and took a bus down to South Bank where there was a cinema. We haven't had our dinner when we left, so after we arrived and got our tickets, one of them said, "I'm hungry, lets go get something to eat".
We then walked over to one of the local convenience shops and i got my first true case of "damn I'm away from Malaysia". I was walking around the shop looking for those Gardenia Sambal Ikan Bilis Buns. I was walking in circles and just when i was about to ask the shop attendant where they were, I suddenly remembered "shit la, this is Australia" and sighed. I was also looking around in the cooler for a Justea and realized that it wasn't just there isn't this drink but a lot our local Malaysian soft drinks.... Haih... Come on Malaysia, do your business internationally, export our yummy food!!!
In the end, i bought myself a packet of chips and a bottle of Ribena. That was my dinner mind you, and i tell you this for experience. No matter how good it may look on TV, it is not fun having potato chips as your dinner, trust me. It is also not as tasty as you may have hoped.
After the movie, which was good by the way, they started looking for dinner. It was 9 something already, for me it was more like supper. We searched around the immediate area but most of the shops were closed with the exception of the pubs and some of the specialty shops. No wonder a lot of people told me there isn't much night life here in Brisbane. In fact, most shops will close by 5.30pm. We took a bus then straight into town center.
There we had Subway for dinner(supper in my case). Quite nice, i think when i eat out, this place will become one of my staple restaurants also. They serve sandwiches, healthy and rather cheap also. We took a bus back to campus after that.
Did you'll know, there is something we all Malaysians have which i like to call Kebangaan Malaysia? Once you reach a foreign country, you really start noticing how remarkable Malaysians are in this aspect.
All Malaysians, please do this now, count how many languages can you speak? Including dialects of each major branch of language. Well? How many did you get?
I for one, got :-
1. English
2. Malay
3. Mandarin
4. Cantonese
5. Hakka
6. A slight comprehension of Hokkien
Are you'll seeing the direction we are heading yet? Haha... I have met countless other people that have already said "Cool man... Damn cool..."
Then there's the second part to this.
Try this, think of a really long sentence. REALLY LONG. Then quickly say the sentence and in between just switch between the languages you know.
Notice how quickly we can change the languages? In fact for me, i don't need too much of an effort to do it. I can change almost instantly. What? I'm pretty sure you're thinking "Hey, this is no big deal". Let me give you an example. There was this Hongkie to challenged me to this. She can speak Mandarin, Cantonese and English. Let's just say she can't switch languages as fast.
Another worthy mention is the standard of English we Malaysians have. I think many of us have been brain washed to believe that in comparison to most of the world, Malaysians have lousy English. It is true to a certain extent. We certainly pale in comparison to the West. But as i have seen so far, our English is certainly much much better than a lot of the Far East and Middle East Asians. No, I'm not talking based on my standards. =P I'm talking based on my friends in Malaysia. Most of the Band 3s in my form 6 class can easily beat about a third of those people in terms of standards of English. Some of the people i have met, can barely even speak a proper sentence with accurate pronunciation. Whereas, even though our vocabulary may be weak, we at least speak in relative accuracy.
Coming back to the acar mentioned earlier, do you know how valuable it is having just a little bottle of Malaysian food?
Me and 3 others (2 Malaysians and 1 Indonesian) are all new students here at the university. Generally, me and one of the Malaysians are faring much better off due to the fact we can still get Asian cooking in the dining hall. The other 2 however, stay off campus and are desperately missing South East Asian cooking (Malaysian cooking in other words la, but got one Indon ma....)
Yesterday, they visited my room. I was actually going to bring the acar out to share with them later. Anyway, they paid a visit to my room as they wanted to have a look at the condition of the hostel. So i took out the bottle and offered some of it to them. I can see the expression of the Indon girl's face when she saw it, "Ooo... Is that Acar?"
Anyway, they all enjoyed it very much. The Korean couple that came with them also liked it.
Me? I still have some left. I was just eating some of it before i started on this blog. It is nice i tell you. ALL Malaysian food is nice when most of the time you just have roast or baked stuff to eat.... Lol...
Enjoy your Malaysian food, =P
5.17pm
23 July 2008
First of all, on Saturday, i went to my Granduncle & Grandaunty's house. It was very very nice of them, they came all the way across Brisbane to fetch me to their place, which by car, took about half an hour (it was a weekend, the traffic was wonderful, i can't imagine on a working day =S)
Well, their house is, how do i put it? Very beautiful. Especially the garden. I also regretted not taking any photographs, damn it la... The next time i visit their place i am definitely going to take some photos of their place.
Their house is near a forest reserve also. In the immediate area there are a lot and i mean A LOT of birds. More than what i get on campus. They also have birds such as cockatoos and many other birds from the same family in addition to all the common birds. They have a creek flowing nearby which according to the locals have platypuses in the waters, very very rare though. According to my granduncle, there have also been sightings of kangaroos in the area once but have since stopped.
They treated me very well there. Most of the meals i had were Malaysian (yay!). They also had a dog, a white one and i can't remember the breed thought. It was cute, furry, bouncy, and spoiled. Haha... She was fun to play with, by the way, her name is Whisky. She's very old though, 12 years and getting slightly blind.
They also brought me sight-seeing a bit at nearby Mount Cootha. Spectacular sight of Brisbane. I was also taken on a tour to my "rival" university, the one which i couldn't go due to my results, University of Queensland which is colossal. I thought my university was already huge. Here was just... You really need a bicycle to travel around.
On Sunday, they sent me all the way back to the campus again... They're so nice i feel very paiseh leh... They also gave me some food for me to keep, a can of peanuts, a box of muesli bars and a bottle of acar(there's more about the bottle of acar).
On Sunday itself, i had to move over to my permanent accommodation in the neighbouring campus. Here, the rooms are bigger and there are a lot more closets. So far, the neighbours here are more civic minded, not to mention quite a few of them are a lot friendlier than in the previous campus.
Well, I've pretty much unpacked already if you are wondering. If there's one thing i like about this place, it is the fact that it is quieter than the previous college (like i said, more civic conscious). My room is on the 5th floor facing away from the university. I get a pretty good view of some of the Brisbane suburbs as well as the distant mountains. Too bad my windows are so damn dirty that i can't take a photo to show you'll.
Another annoying thing about this place, is there is no place for you to hang out your clothes. Yes, they have dryers, but frankly, i don't like the smell of the clothes after they come out of the dryers. This is the time i was happy i packed along one of my scout strings. I'm going to pull up a clothes line in my room. XD
Like i was saying, the people here are much friendlier. Well, yesterday i was asked out to join some of the current students to go for a movie. I accepted, and went to watch Batman. We left the college at about 5pm and took a bus down to South Bank where there was a cinema. We haven't had our dinner when we left, so after we arrived and got our tickets, one of them said, "I'm hungry, lets go get something to eat".
We then walked over to one of the local convenience shops and i got my first true case of "damn I'm away from Malaysia". I was walking around the shop looking for those Gardenia Sambal Ikan Bilis Buns. I was walking in circles and just when i was about to ask the shop attendant where they were, I suddenly remembered "shit la, this is Australia" and sighed. I was also looking around in the cooler for a Justea and realized that it wasn't just there isn't this drink but a lot our local Malaysian soft drinks.... Haih... Come on Malaysia, do your business internationally, export our yummy food!!!
In the end, i bought myself a packet of chips and a bottle of Ribena. That was my dinner mind you, and i tell you this for experience. No matter how good it may look on TV, it is not fun having potato chips as your dinner, trust me. It is also not as tasty as you may have hoped.
After the movie, which was good by the way, they started looking for dinner. It was 9 something already, for me it was more like supper. We searched around the immediate area but most of the shops were closed with the exception of the pubs and some of the specialty shops. No wonder a lot of people told me there isn't much night life here in Brisbane. In fact, most shops will close by 5.30pm. We took a bus then straight into town center.
There we had Subway for dinner(supper in my case). Quite nice, i think when i eat out, this place will become one of my staple restaurants also. They serve sandwiches, healthy and rather cheap also. We took a bus back to campus after that.
Did you'll know, there is something we all Malaysians have which i like to call Kebangaan Malaysia? Once you reach a foreign country, you really start noticing how remarkable Malaysians are in this aspect.
All Malaysians, please do this now, count how many languages can you speak? Including dialects of each major branch of language. Well? How many did you get?
I for one, got :-
1. English
2. Malay
3. Mandarin
4. Cantonese
5. Hakka
6. A slight comprehension of Hokkien
Are you'll seeing the direction we are heading yet? Haha... I have met countless other people that have already said "Cool man... Damn cool..."
Then there's the second part to this.
Try this, think of a really long sentence. REALLY LONG. Then quickly say the sentence and in between just switch between the languages you know.
Notice how quickly we can change the languages? In fact for me, i don't need too much of an effort to do it. I can change almost instantly. What? I'm pretty sure you're thinking "Hey, this is no big deal". Let me give you an example. There was this Hongkie to challenged me to this. She can speak Mandarin, Cantonese and English. Let's just say she can't switch languages as fast.
Another worthy mention is the standard of English we Malaysians have. I think many of us have been brain washed to believe that in comparison to most of the world, Malaysians have lousy English. It is true to a certain extent. We certainly pale in comparison to the West. But as i have seen so far, our English is certainly much much better than a lot of the Far East and Middle East Asians. No, I'm not talking based on my standards. =P I'm talking based on my friends in Malaysia. Most of the Band 3s in my form 6 class can easily beat about a third of those people in terms of standards of English. Some of the people i have met, can barely even speak a proper sentence with accurate pronunciation. Whereas, even though our vocabulary may be weak, we at least speak in relative accuracy.
Coming back to the acar mentioned earlier, do you know how valuable it is having just a little bottle of Malaysian food?
Me and 3 others (2 Malaysians and 1 Indonesian) are all new students here at the university. Generally, me and one of the Malaysians are faring much better off due to the fact we can still get Asian cooking in the dining hall. The other 2 however, stay off campus and are desperately missing South East Asian cooking (Malaysian cooking in other words la, but got one Indon ma....)
Yesterday, they visited my room. I was actually going to bring the acar out to share with them later. Anyway, they paid a visit to my room as they wanted to have a look at the condition of the hostel. So i took out the bottle and offered some of it to them. I can see the expression of the Indon girl's face when she saw it, "Ooo... Is that Acar?"
Anyway, they all enjoyed it very much. The Korean couple that came with them also liked it.
Me? I still have some left. I was just eating some of it before i started on this blog. It is nice i tell you. ALL Malaysian food is nice when most of the time you just have roast or baked stuff to eat.... Lol...
Enjoy your Malaysian food, =P
5.17pm
23 July 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
My form 6 life (Part I-ii : People i met)
This is just a little part i want to add on. I suddenly remembered this other teacher i would love to mention.
I am i strong advocate of equal rights amongst men and women. Both sexes should be given equal opportunities in life doing what they please, be it a homemaker, a teacher, a soldier, a manager etc. Additionally, education and the right to socialize and and mix around as they please. Freedom to do what either sex wants in moderation.
However, i believe that both sides should preserve the traits or characteristics that make them who they are. No, i don't mean that men should always act rough and tough or women acting soft and loving. I believe that both men and women can be equally loving and tough when the situation arises.
What i mean is preserving those distinctive personality traits that each person has to be bring out the best of them from a gender point of view.
Take for example this female friend of mine. She loves to play sports, she has a strong fiery personality and would fight and argue for what she believes is right. She sometimes acts a bit too rough, a bit too tomboy-ish for my liking (note : my liking. But i still think it's fine). But on her soft side, she's a very loyal & loving girl. She will let her heart out and run to you for support.
By preserving traits, i actually mean just be yourself. Why should you always act tough when you know very well you are not? Why should you not dare to show your love and caring just because you "shouldn't"?
By learning to accept who we are, and living our lives as who WE are, this to me is the best imagine one can show, no matter whether you are a guy or a girl.
But i still believe in chivalry and "ladies first" =D
Wah... Damn far off topic, i was supposed to talk about a teacher not gender equalities. But the teacher i want to talk about is some what related to this topic.
Anyway, coming back....
This particular teacher, she is in charge of the Girls Club, the club formed to take care and manage the welfare of the girl students in the school.
She too, strongly believed in equal gender rights for girls, the emancipation of the weaker sex!!
Right...
Yes, she did do a lot of things for the girls, trying to provided them with extra privileges and also trying to protect them.
Then she implemented new rules. Rules like "girls cannot sit on the floor", "girls cannot wear short pants to sports, only track bottoms" and quite a few more rather loony ones which i can't remember. Girls girls, if you can remember the rules, can post em up for me ah?
Anyway, in her attempt to to get gender equality, i felt that she became more sexist. In more than one occasion, she certain made it very clear that she thinks most men are horrible (including her own husband, why marry him in the first place then?). Yes, i understand that she is trying to preserve modesty for this girls, but in most of her attempts, all i see her achieving is further widening the gap between men and women.
This is why i always believe that we should never push too hard for something. If we become over zealous in doing something, we will soon lose sight of reason and moderation.
In her mind, she believes she is doing the right thing. Yes i agree, she was never wrong. But maybe she just went a bit too far and a bit over protective. I don't know, but perhaps it is just me that thinks along these lines (or maybe it's over open-mindedness). But i would love to hear views on this topic.
Alright, it's officially 10.35pm in Brisbane. I'm also getting quite sleepy. The story still isn't finished yet, especially the very important part i promised I'll write for my kids. I didn't realize that once i put the story and experience down on words, it would be so long.
Anyway, goodnight and sweet dreams to all my buddies. I know it's still early over the =P Don't sleep late.
;-)
I am i strong advocate of equal rights amongst men and women. Both sexes should be given equal opportunities in life doing what they please, be it a homemaker, a teacher, a soldier, a manager etc. Additionally, education and the right to socialize and and mix around as they please. Freedom to do what either sex wants in moderation.
However, i believe that both sides should preserve the traits or characteristics that make them who they are. No, i don't mean that men should always act rough and tough or women acting soft and loving. I believe that both men and women can be equally loving and tough when the situation arises.
What i mean is preserving those distinctive personality traits that each person has to be bring out the best of them from a gender point of view.
Take for example this female friend of mine. She loves to play sports, she has a strong fiery personality and would fight and argue for what she believes is right. She sometimes acts a bit too rough, a bit too tomboy-ish for my liking (note : my liking. But i still think it's fine). But on her soft side, she's a very loyal & loving girl. She will let her heart out and run to you for support.
By preserving traits, i actually mean just be yourself. Why should you always act tough when you know very well you are not? Why should you not dare to show your love and caring just because you "shouldn't"?
By learning to accept who we are, and living our lives as who WE are, this to me is the best imagine one can show, no matter whether you are a guy or a girl.
But i still believe in chivalry and "ladies first" =D
Wah... Damn far off topic, i was supposed to talk about a teacher not gender equalities. But the teacher i want to talk about is some what related to this topic.
Anyway, coming back....
This particular teacher, she is in charge of the Girls Club, the club formed to take care and manage the welfare of the girl students in the school.
She too, strongly believed in equal gender rights for girls, the emancipation of the weaker sex!!
Right...
Yes, she did do a lot of things for the girls, trying to provided them with extra privileges and also trying to protect them.
Then she implemented new rules. Rules like "girls cannot sit on the floor", "girls cannot wear short pants to sports, only track bottoms" and quite a few more rather loony ones which i can't remember. Girls girls, if you can remember the rules, can post em up for me ah?
Anyway, in her attempt to to get gender equality, i felt that she became more sexist. In more than one occasion, she certain made it very clear that she thinks most men are horrible (including her own husband, why marry him in the first place then?). Yes, i understand that she is trying to preserve modesty for this girls, but in most of her attempts, all i see her achieving is further widening the gap between men and women.
This is why i always believe that we should never push too hard for something. If we become over zealous in doing something, we will soon lose sight of reason and moderation.
In her mind, she believes she is doing the right thing. Yes i agree, she was never wrong. But maybe she just went a bit too far and a bit over protective. I don't know, but perhaps it is just me that thinks along these lines (or maybe it's over open-mindedness). But i would love to hear views on this topic.
Alright, it's officially 10.35pm in Brisbane. I'm also getting quite sleepy. The story still isn't finished yet, especially the very important part i promised I'll write for my kids. I didn't realize that once i put the story and experience down on words, it would be so long.
Anyway, goodnight and sweet dreams to all my buddies. I know it's still early over the =P Don't sleep late.
;-)
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
My form 6 life (Part II : The essence of of life then)
If there's one thing i learned from my life in form 6, the most important would be that you are responsible to manage your own life.
Before i proceed, let me first share my STPM results :-
Pengajian Am (General Studies) : B+
Mathematics : D
Chemistry : C+
Biology : B+
(C and above are considered principal passes. C- and below are half fails. F is considered complete fail)
To me i am satisfied with the results. But I'll be honest with you, this are actually extremely lousy grades.
If the CGPA is calculated, my CGPA is only 2.58. Yes, i still managed to get local university with these grades, Environmental Science at Universiti Malaysia Sabah. But most people who get such a course would have turned it down immediately, appealed or EXTREMELY reluctantly gone and taken the course.
Nonetheless, with these grades i managed to get into University. I'm now in Australia, for those that didn't know, doing the exact same course that i was offered, Environmental Science. But that's not my topic today.
Like i was saying, i am satisfied with my grades. With my biology marks to be specific. With the other three subjects though, it's a different story.
Why am i satisfied? To honestly tell you, i have never put so much effort before in my life in my studies. The amount of time and work i put into my Biology, i managed to change my grade from an F to a B+. I have a feeling my biology teacher was thanking her lucky stars that she didn't make the "if you pass / get good grades, I'll eat my shoe" bet with me.
In fact, most people that didn't see the effort i put into my this subject were very shocked by that grade i got. I surpassed quite a few other students and matched another few.
As for the other three subjects, my PA (Pengajian Am) was a bit disappointing. I was hoping for at least an A- in it, but i suppose the silly mistake i made cost me the grade. For my chemistry and mathematics, i really have no excuse for it.
I know how much effort i put into those 2 subjects, and it wasn't much mind you. Take my chemistry for example. I know how much better i could have scored if i studied harder. You know why i say that? Cause i looked through my exam paper and i laughed. I knew about 60 - 70% of the paper, but i couldn't answer most of it because i never studied enough for it. In the last few weeks before my exam, i can shamefully say i was very negligent of my studies. Not to mention in the many months before it.
My maths was in an even worse off shape. From back in Form 4, i never put in enough effort to do my maths properly. An vicious cycle came along - The maths was hard, i didn't bother working hard to try and the maths became even harder. This cycle continued into my Form 6 and it really caused me hell.
Despite all the good support and help given by my friends, most of the time i never even attempted to try to do the maths. Subsequently the work load just overwhelmed me and i just gave up on the subject. See what happened in the end?
Looking at some of my friends in school, their maths initially was just as bad as mine. But through hard work and dedication, many later got satisfactory or even good grades. See the power of effort?
I am ashamed of myself. Guess it takes a really hard lesson before one sees the light. But at least in these 2 years, i learned that "if you want something, you work for it" the hard way.
Another piece of advice i want to share is please please please don't give up. I gave up on my maths and i paid for it. Now, even in university, that decision is coming back to haunt me. I just flipped through my Statistics textbook today, and all i could do was sigh....
Independence - the ability to take initiative and do something yourself - as how i define it.
Well, the school really thought us this lesson. I'm not bad mouthing the teachers or what, but seriously, I have never met such lazy teachers before.
So lazy that the amount of times she ever came into class for the entire year was less than 30 (maybe even less, i counted back then. I forgot now.). So lazy that he never even bothered to mark our trial papers. So lazy that even a signature would take too much effort for him.
Amazing really, in fact so amazing that a lot of people i tell to these stories don't believe me. Would you believe that? Need proof? Just ask any of my form 6 class mates.
Then from my juniors, i only learned this is mostly the case with the teachers of this school. Students run their clubs almost totally independent of the teachers. Students find their own ways and means to study and do well in exams. Student use only their own wits and effort to conjure amazing performances and works.
To me, that is just cool.
The other rude awakening i got, in fact most of us Form 6 got was how bad discrimination can get.
Most 6 formers in the school come from their own secondary schools where they did their form 1 - 5. As a result, the 6 formers in the school was separated into two groups. The first being their "true" students which are student that we originally studying in the school and the second as the "non-true" students who me and a few other friends would fondly call "fakes". In fact, many of us took pride in calling ourselves fakes.
The "non-true" groups were also subsequently divided further. I forgot to mention that school was a boys school for the lower forms and co-ed was only for form 6. Subsequently, we were further divided into the two sexes. The girls would have equal privilege to the "true" students. We, the remaining boys, how should i put it? Treated like shit.
Have any of you'll ever felt the pain of not being acknowledged? Not matter how hard you tried to mix in or tried to be like them. Even if people don't accept you into their circle, i feel the least someone can do is acknowledge that you exist also.
At one of the speeches made by the seniors, he said something that really made us fakes burn in our seat and it was probably the worst instance of insult and discrimination that ever occurred. He was about to graduate and this was his farewell speech. In his own words :
".... To all the True XXXX, and also all the girls, these 2 years will be the best two years of your school life. Enjoy it......"
I have nothing to say. He was the person elected to take care of us the form 6s. I don't know if it was a genuine mistake or he purposely left the extra part out.
The evening on that day, i swore myself as a True SMKBBSP-ian.
Things certainly didn't get any better when it came to the faculty. Although many of the teacher preferred us fakes because we tend to respect the teachers more and were less disruptive (the teacher's words, not mine i have witnesses). Like the students themselves, much of the faculty only saw the trues and the girls in their eyes. Us? We were just extras. When they needed us they would approach us saying we are part of the school and we should help out and support the school activities (mind you, a lot of us did). When they didn't need us, they would find all reasons to criticize us and blame us for certain things that go wrong.
I feel that some of the most pitiful people around around those that are living in denial or those that have no choice but to do so. Imagine having to live a life that is nothing more than a lie and having to believe that lie... Just sad..
Sometimes a fact is just a fact. No matter how much you try to deny it, it will forever be a fact. Yes, in your mind, if you persuade it enough it will most certainly be good, but reality won't budge no matter how hard you try to think it away.
I certainly understand the glorious days that the school once had. Those days even just uttering the name would have inspired awe amongst the people. But nowadays, only in the older generation's eye the school still has the glory. Amongst the youth, the school has become nothing more than a mockery of it's former glory.
Is it so hard to just accept the fact and then take action and improve it? If you did that certain you would command even more respect. I don't deny that in certain aspects the school still does wonderfully, but truly, is it enough?
Respect is earned not demanded. If any people should know this, I am one of those that know this all too well (right dou kei-s?).
Getting people to listen to you or follow your instructions is certainly not hard. Trust me, i know. Getting them to respect you to a very different ball game.
From where i come from ( as in SMKBBSP) and in most schools, to really control the students as a prefect, you must really earn the respect of the students. If i tried what the prefects in my form 6 school did, the instance i stepped out of school i would have a committee waiting for me to give some "love".
I realize that each school will have it's own sets of cultures and practices. I don't criticize the way the prefects of my form 6 school do their job, i just feel there are better and more practical ways to do things. Tradition is something, but it is not everything.
For clarification sake, let me just tell you how the prefects treat us. First of all, they come around screaming and shouting. This is traditionally how they do their job (sometimes though, i just think they take this as an excuse to go around screaming at others and enjoying it while at the job). They kind of act like how gangsters do. When they find some one that opposes them, they will come in a group to confront that student. A few of them, much to our chagrin, does more than scream. They even kick or punch the students that disobey them.
To tell the truth, I'm actually extremely grateful that i went to this school. For all the bad that i feel this school had, it actually did the greatest good for me.
It made me matured.
I have never ever EVER been so patient and tolerant throughout my entire life. Haha... Learning how to swallow down that feeling of discontent, smile and move on with life was probably one of the best lessons the school gave me.
The overall environment of the school is a good reflection of society. By being so materialistic, so judgmental, so discriminative and so unfair, it is a preparation for us to enter society. Maybe this is the true reason why so many students of this school can become so successful. From young, they are taught to be independent, hardworking, optimistic and tolerant. All key traits to be successful. Maybe this is why...
Maybe this is why we should all be thankful to the school...
Before i proceed, let me first share my STPM results :-
Pengajian Am (General Studies) : B+
Mathematics : D
Chemistry : C+
Biology : B+
(C and above are considered principal passes. C- and below are half fails. F is considered complete fail)
To me i am satisfied with the results. But I'll be honest with you, this are actually extremely lousy grades.
If the CGPA is calculated, my CGPA is only 2.58. Yes, i still managed to get local university with these grades, Environmental Science at Universiti Malaysia Sabah. But most people who get such a course would have turned it down immediately, appealed or EXTREMELY reluctantly gone and taken the course.
Nonetheless, with these grades i managed to get into University. I'm now in Australia, for those that didn't know, doing the exact same course that i was offered, Environmental Science. But that's not my topic today.
Like i was saying, i am satisfied with my grades. With my biology marks to be specific. With the other three subjects though, it's a different story.
Why am i satisfied? To honestly tell you, i have never put so much effort before in my life in my studies. The amount of time and work i put into my Biology, i managed to change my grade from an F to a B+. I have a feeling my biology teacher was thanking her lucky stars that she didn't make the "if you pass / get good grades, I'll eat my shoe" bet with me.
In fact, most people that didn't see the effort i put into my this subject were very shocked by that grade i got. I surpassed quite a few other students and matched another few.
As for the other three subjects, my PA (Pengajian Am) was a bit disappointing. I was hoping for at least an A- in it, but i suppose the silly mistake i made cost me the grade. For my chemistry and mathematics, i really have no excuse for it.
I know how much effort i put into those 2 subjects, and it wasn't much mind you. Take my chemistry for example. I know how much better i could have scored if i studied harder. You know why i say that? Cause i looked through my exam paper and i laughed. I knew about 60 - 70% of the paper, but i couldn't answer most of it because i never studied enough for it. In the last few weeks before my exam, i can shamefully say i was very negligent of my studies. Not to mention in the many months before it.
My maths was in an even worse off shape. From back in Form 4, i never put in enough effort to do my maths properly. An vicious cycle came along - The maths was hard, i didn't bother working hard to try and the maths became even harder. This cycle continued into my Form 6 and it really caused me hell.
Despite all the good support and help given by my friends, most of the time i never even attempted to try to do the maths. Subsequently the work load just overwhelmed me and i just gave up on the subject. See what happened in the end?
Looking at some of my friends in school, their maths initially was just as bad as mine. But through hard work and dedication, many later got satisfactory or even good grades. See the power of effort?
I am ashamed of myself. Guess it takes a really hard lesson before one sees the light. But at least in these 2 years, i learned that "if you want something, you work for it" the hard way.
Another piece of advice i want to share is please please please don't give up. I gave up on my maths and i paid for it. Now, even in university, that decision is coming back to haunt me. I just flipped through my Statistics textbook today, and all i could do was sigh....
Independence - the ability to take initiative and do something yourself - as how i define it.
Well, the school really thought us this lesson. I'm not bad mouthing the teachers or what, but seriously, I have never met such lazy teachers before.
So lazy that the amount of times she ever came into class for the entire year was less than 30 (maybe even less, i counted back then. I forgot now.). So lazy that he never even bothered to mark our trial papers. So lazy that even a signature would take too much effort for him.
Amazing really, in fact so amazing that a lot of people i tell to these stories don't believe me. Would you believe that? Need proof? Just ask any of my form 6 class mates.
Then from my juniors, i only learned this is mostly the case with the teachers of this school. Students run their clubs almost totally independent of the teachers. Students find their own ways and means to study and do well in exams. Student use only their own wits and effort to conjure amazing performances and works.
To me, that is just cool.
The other rude awakening i got, in fact most of us Form 6 got was how bad discrimination can get.
Most 6 formers in the school come from their own secondary schools where they did their form 1 - 5. As a result, the 6 formers in the school was separated into two groups. The first being their "true" students which are student that we originally studying in the school and the second as the "non-true" students who me and a few other friends would fondly call "fakes". In fact, many of us took pride in calling ourselves fakes.
The "non-true" groups were also subsequently divided further. I forgot to mention that school was a boys school for the lower forms and co-ed was only for form 6. Subsequently, we were further divided into the two sexes. The girls would have equal privilege to the "true" students. We, the remaining boys, how should i put it? Treated like shit.
Have any of you'll ever felt the pain of not being acknowledged? Not matter how hard you tried to mix in or tried to be like them. Even if people don't accept you into their circle, i feel the least someone can do is acknowledge that you exist also.
At one of the speeches made by the seniors, he said something that really made us fakes burn in our seat and it was probably the worst instance of insult and discrimination that ever occurred. He was about to graduate and this was his farewell speech. In his own words :
".... To all the True XXXX, and also all the girls, these 2 years will be the best two years of your school life. Enjoy it......"
I have nothing to say. He was the person elected to take care of us the form 6s. I don't know if it was a genuine mistake or he purposely left the extra part out.
The evening on that day, i swore myself as a True SMKBBSP-ian.
Things certainly didn't get any better when it came to the faculty. Although many of the teacher preferred us fakes because we tend to respect the teachers more and were less disruptive (the teacher's words, not mine i have witnesses). Like the students themselves, much of the faculty only saw the trues and the girls in their eyes. Us? We were just extras. When they needed us they would approach us saying we are part of the school and we should help out and support the school activities (mind you, a lot of us did). When they didn't need us, they would find all reasons to criticize us and blame us for certain things that go wrong.
I feel that some of the most pitiful people around around those that are living in denial or those that have no choice but to do so. Imagine having to live a life that is nothing more than a lie and having to believe that lie... Just sad..
Sometimes a fact is just a fact. No matter how much you try to deny it, it will forever be a fact. Yes, in your mind, if you persuade it enough it will most certainly be good, but reality won't budge no matter how hard you try to think it away.
I certainly understand the glorious days that the school once had. Those days even just uttering the name would have inspired awe amongst the people. But nowadays, only in the older generation's eye the school still has the glory. Amongst the youth, the school has become nothing more than a mockery of it's former glory.
Is it so hard to just accept the fact and then take action and improve it? If you did that certain you would command even more respect. I don't deny that in certain aspects the school still does wonderfully, but truly, is it enough?
Respect is earned not demanded. If any people should know this, I am one of those that know this all too well (right dou kei-s?).
Getting people to listen to you or follow your instructions is certainly not hard. Trust me, i know. Getting them to respect you to a very different ball game.
From where i come from ( as in SMKBBSP) and in most schools, to really control the students as a prefect, you must really earn the respect of the students. If i tried what the prefects in my form 6 school did, the instance i stepped out of school i would have a committee waiting for me to give some "love".
I realize that each school will have it's own sets of cultures and practices. I don't criticize the way the prefects of my form 6 school do their job, i just feel there are better and more practical ways to do things. Tradition is something, but it is not everything.
For clarification sake, let me just tell you how the prefects treat us. First of all, they come around screaming and shouting. This is traditionally how they do their job (sometimes though, i just think they take this as an excuse to go around screaming at others and enjoying it while at the job). They kind of act like how gangsters do. When they find some one that opposes them, they will come in a group to confront that student. A few of them, much to our chagrin, does more than scream. They even kick or punch the students that disobey them.
To tell the truth, I'm actually extremely grateful that i went to this school. For all the bad that i feel this school had, it actually did the greatest good for me.
It made me matured.
I have never ever EVER been so patient and tolerant throughout my entire life. Haha... Learning how to swallow down that feeling of discontent, smile and move on with life was probably one of the best lessons the school gave me.
The overall environment of the school is a good reflection of society. By being so materialistic, so judgmental, so discriminative and so unfair, it is a preparation for us to enter society. Maybe this is the true reason why so many students of this school can become so successful. From young, they are taught to be independent, hardworking, optimistic and tolerant. All key traits to be successful. Maybe this is why...
Maybe this is why we should all be thankful to the school...
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