I love rain
Has anyone realized how beautiful rain is?
Each drop, making it's own courageous journey from the heavens,
Flying, gliding down to the scorched parched earth...
There is a saying - still water runs deep
There is no denying, it is calm up to a certain extent
Yet, at the bottom of it all, the fury of the torrents rage on
The perfect balance of things, or just a painful reality?
**********
As how someone i know used to go : "Saya tak gembira..."
Recently i seem to like that phrase very much as well...
Sometimes i really don't understand myself
On one hand, i am the eye of the storm
Yet, i'm the gale that surrounds it as well
**********
You know what the worst part of being away is?
The distance
The distance from things you hold true and dear
The distance from some of your childhood dreams
The distance from ideals and promises that you have held on your entire life
The distance from the familiar senses that make your day whole
The distance from the emotions that some may have tried to escape
The distance from the pillars that hold you up
The thought of being away....
**********
I'm here,
away...
I don't have much :
- a few dreams
- a small new family
- the excitement something new
- the spirit of a traveler
- believes
- faiths
- courage
- hopes
and yet...
I have everything
Lai Jian Wei
10.32pm
Wednesday 4th March 2009
Showing posts with label Stories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stories. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Leaving...
Of late i realized something really interesting about myself - i've been putting off writing my blog for a long time adi... The last time i wrote was, well, before i left Brisbane. Now, i'm writing again. This time, will be before i go back to Brisbane.
Actually, throughout these few months, i have composed a few posts, just that i have never gotten around to finish writing them. The reason? Mood swings XD
But yala, throughout these few months i have been having a lot of ups and downs (please don't ask, don't really feel like talking about them). Currently my mood has reached the stage where i don't want to go back to Brisbane.... That is a long story la, to make it simple, let's just say being away then coming back made me realize i treasured a lot of things here and that the moment i go back to Aussie, i lose a lot of these things....
For a friend, yes you were right. I really really did enjoy myself back here in Malaysia. At the very least, i was distracted a lot by my darlings and friends a like. Sometimes i wonder, is it because i went overseas that i having a lot of attention from all my friends? Or is it just because i'm having a bout of really good jodoh this year? Haha... Either way, i'm not complaining. It's been a wonderful holiday for me (albeit the boredom of sitting alone at home doing nothing la...)
Friends are a wonderful thing. Somehow, they just have a knack of showing up at the right time and making problems miraculously disappear (for the moment at least) or just provide you with a dose of "healthy" distraction....
Most importantly, friends help you without they themselves or even you realizing it. It's a kind of abstract thing, not something you can grasp immediately after you read this or if that light bulb of inspiration flashes in your head. Speaking on this... Can i ask for a moment of silence for a friend, Yun Chi that passed away on the 5th of February...
...
...
...
...
...
Thank you
Like i was saying, she is a good example of this. Her passing, i believe has brought good a lot of people she once knew. Her passing was quite a sudden news to many of us, it just reflected on the fragility of life as we know it. At least for me, it made me realize that somethings are just unexpected. I'm sure many people have at some point in their lives, contemplated the fact "what would happen if suddenly my friend or a family member dies? Hmm..."
Contemplating and trying to prepare yourself mentally is one thing, when it actually happens, it is a totally different story all together... I admit, i'm not really very close to Yun Chi, but she is the first of my friends that has actually left us, forever... Her spirit may still be close to us, but she will always be an ethereal presence from now on... (haih...)
After paying my last respects, i was very angry for a moment. At myself. Why? I realized that i am a man surrounded by a lot of friends and i really mean A LOT. Yes, many of them i could say are casual acquaintances, some slightly better friends. Then of coz there are my darlings, beloveds and kids. And to think with so many people around me, i always complain i'm lonely. Worst still, i don't even bother keep in touch with many of these people. Only saying hi when i meet them and then have a few short sentences of a conversation and that's it.
As the anger slowly simmered off, sadness took it's place. It is very true the saying, "You may be best friends this year, very good friends the next year, close friends the following, and just acquaintances after that." When i look back, i do hold a lot of regrets, some of my once best friends when i see them today all i can bring out of me to say is just "hello" or "how have you been lately?" I do blame myself, but i also do realize that we just cannot have time for everybody as much as we try, as much as we want to...
Sad isn't it?
Lai Jian Wei
2.36pm
15 February 2009
Actually, throughout these few months, i have composed a few posts, just that i have never gotten around to finish writing them. The reason? Mood swings XD
But yala, throughout these few months i have been having a lot of ups and downs (please don't ask, don't really feel like talking about them). Currently my mood has reached the stage where i don't want to go back to Brisbane.... That is a long story la, to make it simple, let's just say being away then coming back made me realize i treasured a lot of things here and that the moment i go back to Aussie, i lose a lot of these things....
For a friend, yes you were right. I really really did enjoy myself back here in Malaysia. At the very least, i was distracted a lot by my darlings and friends a like. Sometimes i wonder, is it because i went overseas that i having a lot of attention from all my friends? Or is it just because i'm having a bout of really good jodoh this year? Haha... Either way, i'm not complaining. It's been a wonderful holiday for me (albeit the boredom of sitting alone at home doing nothing la...)
Friends are a wonderful thing. Somehow, they just have a knack of showing up at the right time and making problems miraculously disappear (for the moment at least) or just provide you with a dose of "healthy" distraction....
Most importantly, friends help you without they themselves or even you realizing it. It's a kind of abstract thing, not something you can grasp immediately after you read this or if that light bulb of inspiration flashes in your head. Speaking on this... Can i ask for a moment of silence for a friend, Yun Chi that passed away on the 5th of February...
...
...
...
...
...
Thank you
Like i was saying, she is a good example of this. Her passing, i believe has brought good a lot of people she once knew. Her passing was quite a sudden news to many of us, it just reflected on the fragility of life as we know it. At least for me, it made me realize that somethings are just unexpected. I'm sure many people have at some point in their lives, contemplated the fact "what would happen if suddenly my friend or a family member dies? Hmm..."
Contemplating and trying to prepare yourself mentally is one thing, when it actually happens, it is a totally different story all together... I admit, i'm not really very close to Yun Chi, but she is the first of my friends that has actually left us, forever... Her spirit may still be close to us, but she will always be an ethereal presence from now on... (haih...)
After paying my last respects, i was very angry for a moment. At myself. Why? I realized that i am a man surrounded by a lot of friends and i really mean A LOT. Yes, many of them i could say are casual acquaintances, some slightly better friends. Then of coz there are my darlings, beloveds and kids. And to think with so many people around me, i always complain i'm lonely. Worst still, i don't even bother keep in touch with many of these people. Only saying hi when i meet them and then have a few short sentences of a conversation and that's it.
As the anger slowly simmered off, sadness took it's place. It is very true the saying, "You may be best friends this year, very good friends the next year, close friends the following, and just acquaintances after that." When i look back, i do hold a lot of regrets, some of my once best friends when i see them today all i can bring out of me to say is just "hello" or "how have you been lately?" I do blame myself, but i also do realize that we just cannot have time for everybody as much as we try, as much as we want to...
Sad isn't it?
Lai Jian Wei
2.36pm
15 February 2009
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Today is a cloudy day....
Today is a cloudy day in Brisbane, and it is REALLY cloudy.... Not too mention cold(ughhh)....
I got up this morning cranky, depressed and sad.... The reason? Because i stopped being a vegetarian that's why. How many people still know what i mean by being vegetarian?
Some things in life are never easy. They take a lot of courage, determination and dedication. Me stopping to be a vegetarian is one of these things. And i had to choose one of the hardest dishes in the world to try and cook.
First of all, collecting ingredients is hard. Next the amount of skill required to cook is phenomenal. As of now i still have not found any reference materials or recipes. I'm doing this blindly, hoping that it will go right, praying lady luck is on my side. Lastly, for this dish to truly come out prefect and nice, i need divine intervention (a.k.a. The People Upstairs on my side).
I'm pretty sure some people will be going OMG now and wishing me best of luck etc. Let's just say, if i put the story down properly, people might be fainting this very moment. Similarly, many people might ask me, "If it's so hard and might not even work out in the end, why try in the first place?"
Answer is simple, if you want good food, of cause you must try and cook it right? I am the type of person that loves good food. Anyone that knows me long enough can bear witness to that, Plus plus, people are going to be very happy if this succeeds.
Enough of the cooking, anyway coming back.....
I got up being cranky and depressed. I hate it when that used to happen. I would be unable to study for the whole day and be extremely snappy towards people for the rest of the day. The worst part is, it somehow has a way of carrying itself over days at end. Making people so afraid of me for days and days.
"Oh sh*t" was the first thought i had when i woke up. I figured I'm going to have a lousy day ahead, not to mention my exams are just a few days away and i still need to study. Lunch certainly didn't go well either, spent an entire lunch not talking much. Talking so little until one of my friends went "Lai, say something already!!"
But, today I realized how much i have grown up.... I stayed focused, yay!! I shoved all my sorrow and depression aside and just put my heart down to study. Not only did i manage to a substantial amount of work done, that distraction cheered me up and made me realize that the problems i thought i had were not that big after all....
Now, I am a cheerful man. Ready to face up again to the daunting tasks before me, ready to take up that responsibility, ready to give it all my best again.
I am at peace with myself again.....
Lai Jian Wei
5.17pm
Sunday, 9th November 2008
p/s : you know something? I really feel like watching Lilo & Stitch now... Huh... But have to study la...
I got up this morning cranky, depressed and sad.... The reason? Because i stopped being a vegetarian that's why. How many people still know what i mean by being vegetarian?
Some things in life are never easy. They take a lot of courage, determination and dedication. Me stopping to be a vegetarian is one of these things. And i had to choose one of the hardest dishes in the world to try and cook.
First of all, collecting ingredients is hard. Next the amount of skill required to cook is phenomenal. As of now i still have not found any reference materials or recipes. I'm doing this blindly, hoping that it will go right, praying lady luck is on my side. Lastly, for this dish to truly come out prefect and nice, i need divine intervention (a.k.a. The People Upstairs on my side).
I'm pretty sure some people will be going OMG now and wishing me best of luck etc. Let's just say, if i put the story down properly, people might be fainting this very moment. Similarly, many people might ask me, "If it's so hard and might not even work out in the end, why try in the first place?"
Answer is simple, if you want good food, of cause you must try and cook it right? I am the type of person that loves good food. Anyone that knows me long enough can bear witness to that, Plus plus, people are going to be very happy if this succeeds.
Enough of the cooking, anyway coming back.....
I got up being cranky and depressed. I hate it when that used to happen. I would be unable to study for the whole day and be extremely snappy towards people for the rest of the day. The worst part is, it somehow has a way of carrying itself over days at end. Making people so afraid of me for days and days.
"Oh sh*t" was the first thought i had when i woke up. I figured I'm going to have a lousy day ahead, not to mention my exams are just a few days away and i still need to study. Lunch certainly didn't go well either, spent an entire lunch not talking much. Talking so little until one of my friends went "Lai, say something already!!"
But, today I realized how much i have grown up.... I stayed focused, yay!! I shoved all my sorrow and depression aside and just put my heart down to study. Not only did i manage to a substantial amount of work done, that distraction cheered me up and made me realize that the problems i thought i had were not that big after all....
Now, I am a cheerful man. Ready to face up again to the daunting tasks before me, ready to take up that responsibility, ready to give it all my best again.
I am at peace with myself again.....
Lai Jian Wei
5.17pm
Sunday, 9th November 2008
p/s : you know something? I really feel like watching Lilo & Stitch now... Huh... But have to study la...
Saturday, October 18, 2008
2 Months & 15 Days....
2 months & 15 days...
What about it?
That was my last blog entry.
In this period of time, some many things have happened. For one i made a lot of really great friends here already. Then at the same time, my semester is coming to an end now, i have a lot of assignments to finish as well as prepare for my finals. I am very nervous, after all I am in another country, not my own.
But the main reason for me being nervous is because of the subject I'm taking, Environmental Science. Why? Because i really really enjoy what I am learning. I really want to do well. I still remember telling my family and friends, if I am allowed to do something i really like, i will be able to excel in it. When i came over, everyone told me that i will do well. I'm now in a culture and setting that is more open to my style of study and more importantly I'm doing a topic which i truly have passion for.
Frankly, looking at how I'm coping so far, I am doing rather well. But some how i feel it is not enough. Yes, I'm getting High Distinctions (someone wants to kill me know when she finds out I'm saying this) but somehow I myself am not satisfied with my own performance. When i read my assignments and essays, i feel they nothing more than a beautiful orchestra of words that have no substance in it. Yet, when i receive it back, i get a compliment from my tutor on on a good job which i don't really feel i deserved very much.
Anyway...
On other matters, in this period my parents had also paid me a visit. For once in my life, I think I was really really happy to see them. Although I admit I'm not especially close with my parents, but seeing them for that few days really did cheer me up a lot. I guess is the reality of not having them by my side was getting to me. Initially, I would get very annoyed because i was not at home. I would want something to use (scissors for example) and suddenly realize that I was not at home and did not have them.
I think this is what they mean by becoming independent and looking after yourself. Time to grow up~~ Haha... Eh, but i must admit though, it has been a really interesting experience. I actually learned how to do a lot of shopping on my own, how to look for better products and settle issues with the bank etc. I am also very very grateful to my parents. Why? From young they made me do a lot of the things around the house and I used to be so annoyed by it. Now I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so happy because of that. I can do every chore that there is. I can even cook better than a lot of people here. =D
Coming back to friends....
I miss my darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok... Done screaming, now can talk adi.... I have been calling back some of my friends in Malaysia. Similarly, i have never been so happy to hear their voice and to be able to talk to them. My friends as well, damn funny la, i still remember one of them screaming "Jian Wei!!!!! So happy!!!!" and some others picking up the phone and being so polite going "Hello, may i know who is this?" which actually scared me. I never thought they could be so polite.
I miss the times that which come out and yum cha. I still have issues talking over IM and the phone la. I need to talk to people face to face to really be able to express myself. I also feel a more personal connection when talking like that. I can relate to them more. This has something to do with the body language. If i remember my number correctly, about 70 - 80% of communication is done subconsciously as body language. The rest of the communication is done by words. This is one reason i don't like to use SMS and chat to talk with people. Twice here in Australia i have upset a good friend due to misunderstanding in SMS and MSN. I'm really really sorry.... =(
Coming on to my friends in Australia, i meet some really great people. Not to mention we do a lot of silly things. Like playing computer over the college LAN network until 3am. We also have a lot of fun time debating over funny issues and talk random things. But two of them are on exchange and will be going back after this semester is over.... Feeling a bit sad thinking of it already. They have been great and wonderful friends all throughout these few months. Really hope i can visit them some day after they have gone back to their home countries.
But like my style back in Malaysia, if i don't want to talk, there is nothing anyone can do about it. This i think has caused me to have a lot less friends that i would have had. Oh well, people who know we probably expected that already. But I'm not in a rush to have a lot of friends. I like to take my time, and make really really high quality friends as i like to put it. =)
There is one last thing I'll touch on this post, however i can't really share much about it. But for the people that know about it, take it as an update on what is happening.
The last blog post was roughly the beginning of it. Over these 10 weeks, so many different things have happened. I have had ups, downs, depression bouts, joy bouts, periods of total exhaustion, and periods of extreme energy.
Soon I'll be taking a break though when i go back to Malaysia. I'm having mixed feelings at the moment, not really sure how i feel. But all I want to do now is to have faith, try my best and wait and see =)
Anyway, it is now 11.40am here. Soon those chibi (Japanese word i learned) will be calling me out for lunch so i think I'll finish this post here. Yes yes, i know, there are still 2 posts i owe you people. But this period i am really very very strained for time.
Actually la, the main reason I'm writing this post is to cheer myself up a bit. Was a bit depressed and frustrated over the past few days. Now that I'm almost done writing i feel A LOT better already.
Take care people.
Will meet those back in Malaysia real soon....
Lai Jian Wei
11.43am
18 October 2008
What about it?
That was my last blog entry.
In this period of time, some many things have happened. For one i made a lot of really great friends here already. Then at the same time, my semester is coming to an end now, i have a lot of assignments to finish as well as prepare for my finals. I am very nervous, after all I am in another country, not my own.
But the main reason for me being nervous is because of the subject I'm taking, Environmental Science. Why? Because i really really enjoy what I am learning. I really want to do well. I still remember telling my family and friends, if I am allowed to do something i really like, i will be able to excel in it. When i came over, everyone told me that i will do well. I'm now in a culture and setting that is more open to my style of study and more importantly I'm doing a topic which i truly have passion for.
Frankly, looking at how I'm coping so far, I am doing rather well. But some how i feel it is not enough. Yes, I'm getting High Distinctions (someone wants to kill me know when she finds out I'm saying this) but somehow I myself am not satisfied with my own performance. When i read my assignments and essays, i feel they nothing more than a beautiful orchestra of words that have no substance in it. Yet, when i receive it back, i get a compliment from my tutor on on a good job which i don't really feel i deserved very much.
Anyway...
On other matters, in this period my parents had also paid me a visit. For once in my life, I think I was really really happy to see them. Although I admit I'm not especially close with my parents, but seeing them for that few days really did cheer me up a lot. I guess is the reality of not having them by my side was getting to me. Initially, I would get very annoyed because i was not at home. I would want something to use (scissors for example) and suddenly realize that I was not at home and did not have them.
I think this is what they mean by becoming independent and looking after yourself. Time to grow up~~ Haha... Eh, but i must admit though, it has been a really interesting experience. I actually learned how to do a lot of shopping on my own, how to look for better products and settle issues with the bank etc. I am also very very grateful to my parents. Why? From young they made me do a lot of the things around the house and I used to be so annoyed by it. Now I am so so so so so so so so so so so so so happy because of that. I can do every chore that there is. I can even cook better than a lot of people here. =D
Coming back to friends....
I miss my darlings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my kids!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I miss my friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok... Done screaming, now can talk adi.... I have been calling back some of my friends in Malaysia. Similarly, i have never been so happy to hear their voice and to be able to talk to them. My friends as well, damn funny la, i still remember one of them screaming "Jian Wei!!!!! So happy!!!!" and some others picking up the phone and being so polite going "Hello, may i know who is this?" which actually scared me. I never thought they could be so polite.
I miss the times that which come out and yum cha. I still have issues talking over IM and the phone la. I need to talk to people face to face to really be able to express myself. I also feel a more personal connection when talking like that. I can relate to them more. This has something to do with the body language. If i remember my number correctly, about 70 - 80% of communication is done subconsciously as body language. The rest of the communication is done by words. This is one reason i don't like to use SMS and chat to talk with people. Twice here in Australia i have upset a good friend due to misunderstanding in SMS and MSN. I'm really really sorry.... =(
Coming on to my friends in Australia, i meet some really great people. Not to mention we do a lot of silly things. Like playing computer over the college LAN network until 3am. We also have a lot of fun time debating over funny issues and talk random things. But two of them are on exchange and will be going back after this semester is over.... Feeling a bit sad thinking of it already. They have been great and wonderful friends all throughout these few months. Really hope i can visit them some day after they have gone back to their home countries.
But like my style back in Malaysia, if i don't want to talk, there is nothing anyone can do about it. This i think has caused me to have a lot less friends that i would have had. Oh well, people who know we probably expected that already. But I'm not in a rush to have a lot of friends. I like to take my time, and make really really high quality friends as i like to put it. =)
There is one last thing I'll touch on this post, however i can't really share much about it. But for the people that know about it, take it as an update on what is happening.
The last blog post was roughly the beginning of it. Over these 10 weeks, so many different things have happened. I have had ups, downs, depression bouts, joy bouts, periods of total exhaustion, and periods of extreme energy.
Soon I'll be taking a break though when i go back to Malaysia. I'm having mixed feelings at the moment, not really sure how i feel. But all I want to do now is to have faith, try my best and wait and see =)
Anyway, it is now 11.40am here. Soon those chibi (Japanese word i learned) will be calling me out for lunch so i think I'll finish this post here. Yes yes, i know, there are still 2 posts i owe you people. But this period i am really very very strained for time.
Actually la, the main reason I'm writing this post is to cheer myself up a bit. Was a bit depressed and frustrated over the past few days. Now that I'm almost done writing i feel A LOT better already.
Take care people.
Will meet those back in Malaysia real soon....
Lai Jian Wei
11.43am
18 October 2008
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Relatives, Moving, Australians, Malaysians
It's been quite a while since i last made a post. Anyway, I'm just taking a break from my form 6 story for the time being. Sorry to one of my kids, coz i haven't written the section of the story down yet. Well, in the meantime, let me just tell you'll about my past few days in Australia.
First of all, on Saturday, i went to my Granduncle & Grandaunty's house. It was very very nice of them, they came all the way across Brisbane to fetch me to their place, which by car, took about half an hour (it was a weekend, the traffic was wonderful, i can't imagine on a working day =S)
Well, their house is, how do i put it? Very beautiful. Especially the garden. I also regretted not taking any photographs, damn it la... The next time i visit their place i am definitely going to take some photos of their place.
Their house is near a forest reserve also. In the immediate area there are a lot and i mean A LOT of birds. More than what i get on campus. They also have birds such as cockatoos and many other birds from the same family in addition to all the common birds. They have a creek flowing nearby which according to the locals have platypuses in the waters, very very rare though. According to my granduncle, there have also been sightings of kangaroos in the area once but have since stopped.
They treated me very well there. Most of the meals i had were Malaysian (yay!). They also had a dog, a white one and i can't remember the breed thought. It was cute, furry, bouncy, and spoiled. Haha... She was fun to play with, by the way, her name is Whisky. She's very old though, 12 years and getting slightly blind.
They also brought me sight-seeing a bit at nearby Mount Cootha. Spectacular sight of Brisbane. I was also taken on a tour to my "rival" university, the one which i couldn't go due to my results, University of Queensland which is colossal. I thought my university was already huge. Here was just... You really need a bicycle to travel around.
On Sunday, they sent me all the way back to the campus again... They're so nice i feel very paiseh leh... They also gave me some food for me to keep, a can of peanuts, a box of muesli bars and a bottle of acar(there's more about the bottle of acar).
On Sunday itself, i had to move over to my permanent accommodation in the neighbouring campus. Here, the rooms are bigger and there are a lot more closets. So far, the neighbours here are more civic minded, not to mention quite a few of them are a lot friendlier than in the previous campus.
Well, I've pretty much unpacked already if you are wondering. If there's one thing i like about this place, it is the fact that it is quieter than the previous college (like i said, more civic conscious). My room is on the 5th floor facing away from the university. I get a pretty good view of some of the Brisbane suburbs as well as the distant mountains. Too bad my windows are so damn dirty that i can't take a photo to show you'll.
Another annoying thing about this place, is there is no place for you to hang out your clothes. Yes, they have dryers, but frankly, i don't like the smell of the clothes after they come out of the dryers. This is the time i was happy i packed along one of my scout strings. I'm going to pull up a clothes line in my room. XD
Like i was saying, the people here are much friendlier. Well, yesterday i was asked out to join some of the current students to go for a movie. I accepted, and went to watch Batman. We left the college at about 5pm and took a bus down to South Bank where there was a cinema. We haven't had our dinner when we left, so after we arrived and got our tickets, one of them said, "I'm hungry, lets go get something to eat".
We then walked over to one of the local convenience shops and i got my first true case of "damn I'm away from Malaysia". I was walking around the shop looking for those Gardenia Sambal Ikan Bilis Buns. I was walking in circles and just when i was about to ask the shop attendant where they were, I suddenly remembered "shit la, this is Australia" and sighed. I was also looking around in the cooler for a Justea and realized that it wasn't just there isn't this drink but a lot our local Malaysian soft drinks.... Haih... Come on Malaysia, do your business internationally, export our yummy food!!!
In the end, i bought myself a packet of chips and a bottle of Ribena. That was my dinner mind you, and i tell you this for experience. No matter how good it may look on TV, it is not fun having potato chips as your dinner, trust me. It is also not as tasty as you may have hoped.
After the movie, which was good by the way, they started looking for dinner. It was 9 something already, for me it was more like supper. We searched around the immediate area but most of the shops were closed with the exception of the pubs and some of the specialty shops. No wonder a lot of people told me there isn't much night life here in Brisbane. In fact, most shops will close by 5.30pm. We took a bus then straight into town center.
There we had Subway for dinner(supper in my case). Quite nice, i think when i eat out, this place will become one of my staple restaurants also. They serve sandwiches, healthy and rather cheap also. We took a bus back to campus after that.
Did you'll know, there is something we all Malaysians have which i like to call Kebangaan Malaysia? Once you reach a foreign country, you really start noticing how remarkable Malaysians are in this aspect.
All Malaysians, please do this now, count how many languages can you speak? Including dialects of each major branch of language. Well? How many did you get?
I for one, got :-
1. English
2. Malay
3. Mandarin
4. Cantonese
5. Hakka
6. A slight comprehension of Hokkien
Are you'll seeing the direction we are heading yet? Haha... I have met countless other people that have already said "Cool man... Damn cool..."
Then there's the second part to this.
Try this, think of a really long sentence. REALLY LONG. Then quickly say the sentence and in between just switch between the languages you know.
Notice how quickly we can change the languages? In fact for me, i don't need too much of an effort to do it. I can change almost instantly. What? I'm pretty sure you're thinking "Hey, this is no big deal". Let me give you an example. There was this Hongkie to challenged me to this. She can speak Mandarin, Cantonese and English. Let's just say she can't switch languages as fast.
Another worthy mention is the standard of English we Malaysians have. I think many of us have been brain washed to believe that in comparison to most of the world, Malaysians have lousy English. It is true to a certain extent. We certainly pale in comparison to the West. But as i have seen so far, our English is certainly much much better than a lot of the Far East and Middle East Asians. No, I'm not talking based on my standards. =P I'm talking based on my friends in Malaysia. Most of the Band 3s in my form 6 class can easily beat about a third of those people in terms of standards of English. Some of the people i have met, can barely even speak a proper sentence with accurate pronunciation. Whereas, even though our vocabulary may be weak, we at least speak in relative accuracy.
Coming back to the acar mentioned earlier, do you know how valuable it is having just a little bottle of Malaysian food?
Me and 3 others (2 Malaysians and 1 Indonesian) are all new students here at the university. Generally, me and one of the Malaysians are faring much better off due to the fact we can still get Asian cooking in the dining hall. The other 2 however, stay off campus and are desperately missing South East Asian cooking (Malaysian cooking in other words la, but got one Indon ma....)
Yesterday, they visited my room. I was actually going to bring the acar out to share with them later. Anyway, they paid a visit to my room as they wanted to have a look at the condition of the hostel. So i took out the bottle and offered some of it to them. I can see the expression of the Indon girl's face when she saw it, "Ooo... Is that Acar?"
Anyway, they all enjoyed it very much. The Korean couple that came with them also liked it.
Me? I still have some left. I was just eating some of it before i started on this blog. It is nice i tell you. ALL Malaysian food is nice when most of the time you just have roast or baked stuff to eat.... Lol...
Enjoy your Malaysian food, =P
5.17pm
23 July 2008
First of all, on Saturday, i went to my Granduncle & Grandaunty's house. It was very very nice of them, they came all the way across Brisbane to fetch me to their place, which by car, took about half an hour (it was a weekend, the traffic was wonderful, i can't imagine on a working day =S)
Well, their house is, how do i put it? Very beautiful. Especially the garden. I also regretted not taking any photographs, damn it la... The next time i visit their place i am definitely going to take some photos of their place.
Their house is near a forest reserve also. In the immediate area there are a lot and i mean A LOT of birds. More than what i get on campus. They also have birds such as cockatoos and many other birds from the same family in addition to all the common birds. They have a creek flowing nearby which according to the locals have platypuses in the waters, very very rare though. According to my granduncle, there have also been sightings of kangaroos in the area once but have since stopped.
They treated me very well there. Most of the meals i had were Malaysian (yay!). They also had a dog, a white one and i can't remember the breed thought. It was cute, furry, bouncy, and spoiled. Haha... She was fun to play with, by the way, her name is Whisky. She's very old though, 12 years and getting slightly blind.
They also brought me sight-seeing a bit at nearby Mount Cootha. Spectacular sight of Brisbane. I was also taken on a tour to my "rival" university, the one which i couldn't go due to my results, University of Queensland which is colossal. I thought my university was already huge. Here was just... You really need a bicycle to travel around.
On Sunday, they sent me all the way back to the campus again... They're so nice i feel very paiseh leh... They also gave me some food for me to keep, a can of peanuts, a box of muesli bars and a bottle of acar(there's more about the bottle of acar).
On Sunday itself, i had to move over to my permanent accommodation in the neighbouring campus. Here, the rooms are bigger and there are a lot more closets. So far, the neighbours here are more civic minded, not to mention quite a few of them are a lot friendlier than in the previous campus.
Well, I've pretty much unpacked already if you are wondering. If there's one thing i like about this place, it is the fact that it is quieter than the previous college (like i said, more civic conscious). My room is on the 5th floor facing away from the university. I get a pretty good view of some of the Brisbane suburbs as well as the distant mountains. Too bad my windows are so damn dirty that i can't take a photo to show you'll.
Another annoying thing about this place, is there is no place for you to hang out your clothes. Yes, they have dryers, but frankly, i don't like the smell of the clothes after they come out of the dryers. This is the time i was happy i packed along one of my scout strings. I'm going to pull up a clothes line in my room. XD
Like i was saying, the people here are much friendlier. Well, yesterday i was asked out to join some of the current students to go for a movie. I accepted, and went to watch Batman. We left the college at about 5pm and took a bus down to South Bank where there was a cinema. We haven't had our dinner when we left, so after we arrived and got our tickets, one of them said, "I'm hungry, lets go get something to eat".
We then walked over to one of the local convenience shops and i got my first true case of "damn I'm away from Malaysia". I was walking around the shop looking for those Gardenia Sambal Ikan Bilis Buns. I was walking in circles and just when i was about to ask the shop attendant where they were, I suddenly remembered "shit la, this is Australia" and sighed. I was also looking around in the cooler for a Justea and realized that it wasn't just there isn't this drink but a lot our local Malaysian soft drinks.... Haih... Come on Malaysia, do your business internationally, export our yummy food!!!
In the end, i bought myself a packet of chips and a bottle of Ribena. That was my dinner mind you, and i tell you this for experience. No matter how good it may look on TV, it is not fun having potato chips as your dinner, trust me. It is also not as tasty as you may have hoped.
After the movie, which was good by the way, they started looking for dinner. It was 9 something already, for me it was more like supper. We searched around the immediate area but most of the shops were closed with the exception of the pubs and some of the specialty shops. No wonder a lot of people told me there isn't much night life here in Brisbane. In fact, most shops will close by 5.30pm. We took a bus then straight into town center.
There we had Subway for dinner(supper in my case). Quite nice, i think when i eat out, this place will become one of my staple restaurants also. They serve sandwiches, healthy and rather cheap also. We took a bus back to campus after that.
Did you'll know, there is something we all Malaysians have which i like to call Kebangaan Malaysia? Once you reach a foreign country, you really start noticing how remarkable Malaysians are in this aspect.
All Malaysians, please do this now, count how many languages can you speak? Including dialects of each major branch of language. Well? How many did you get?
I for one, got :-
1. English
2. Malay
3. Mandarin
4. Cantonese
5. Hakka
6. A slight comprehension of Hokkien
Are you'll seeing the direction we are heading yet? Haha... I have met countless other people that have already said "Cool man... Damn cool..."
Then there's the second part to this.
Try this, think of a really long sentence. REALLY LONG. Then quickly say the sentence and in between just switch between the languages you know.
Notice how quickly we can change the languages? In fact for me, i don't need too much of an effort to do it. I can change almost instantly. What? I'm pretty sure you're thinking "Hey, this is no big deal". Let me give you an example. There was this Hongkie to challenged me to this. She can speak Mandarin, Cantonese and English. Let's just say she can't switch languages as fast.
Another worthy mention is the standard of English we Malaysians have. I think many of us have been brain washed to believe that in comparison to most of the world, Malaysians have lousy English. It is true to a certain extent. We certainly pale in comparison to the West. But as i have seen so far, our English is certainly much much better than a lot of the Far East and Middle East Asians. No, I'm not talking based on my standards. =P I'm talking based on my friends in Malaysia. Most of the Band 3s in my form 6 class can easily beat about a third of those people in terms of standards of English. Some of the people i have met, can barely even speak a proper sentence with accurate pronunciation. Whereas, even though our vocabulary may be weak, we at least speak in relative accuracy.
Coming back to the acar mentioned earlier, do you know how valuable it is having just a little bottle of Malaysian food?
Me and 3 others (2 Malaysians and 1 Indonesian) are all new students here at the university. Generally, me and one of the Malaysians are faring much better off due to the fact we can still get Asian cooking in the dining hall. The other 2 however, stay off campus and are desperately missing South East Asian cooking (Malaysian cooking in other words la, but got one Indon ma....)
Yesterday, they visited my room. I was actually going to bring the acar out to share with them later. Anyway, they paid a visit to my room as they wanted to have a look at the condition of the hostel. So i took out the bottle and offered some of it to them. I can see the expression of the Indon girl's face when she saw it, "Ooo... Is that Acar?"
Anyway, they all enjoyed it very much. The Korean couple that came with them also liked it.
Me? I still have some left. I was just eating some of it before i started on this blog. It is nice i tell you. ALL Malaysian food is nice when most of the time you just have roast or baked stuff to eat.... Lol...
Enjoy your Malaysian food, =P
5.17pm
23 July 2008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
My form 6 life (Part II : The essence of of life then)
If there's one thing i learned from my life in form 6, the most important would be that you are responsible to manage your own life.
Before i proceed, let me first share my STPM results :-
Pengajian Am (General Studies) : B+
Mathematics : D
Chemistry : C+
Biology : B+
(C and above are considered principal passes. C- and below are half fails. F is considered complete fail)
To me i am satisfied with the results. But I'll be honest with you, this are actually extremely lousy grades.
If the CGPA is calculated, my CGPA is only 2.58. Yes, i still managed to get local university with these grades, Environmental Science at Universiti Malaysia Sabah. But most people who get such a course would have turned it down immediately, appealed or EXTREMELY reluctantly gone and taken the course.
Nonetheless, with these grades i managed to get into University. I'm now in Australia, for those that didn't know, doing the exact same course that i was offered, Environmental Science. But that's not my topic today.
Like i was saying, i am satisfied with my grades. With my biology marks to be specific. With the other three subjects though, it's a different story.
Why am i satisfied? To honestly tell you, i have never put so much effort before in my life in my studies. The amount of time and work i put into my Biology, i managed to change my grade from an F to a B+. I have a feeling my biology teacher was thanking her lucky stars that she didn't make the "if you pass / get good grades, I'll eat my shoe" bet with me.
In fact, most people that didn't see the effort i put into my this subject were very shocked by that grade i got. I surpassed quite a few other students and matched another few.
As for the other three subjects, my PA (Pengajian Am) was a bit disappointing. I was hoping for at least an A- in it, but i suppose the silly mistake i made cost me the grade. For my chemistry and mathematics, i really have no excuse for it.
I know how much effort i put into those 2 subjects, and it wasn't much mind you. Take my chemistry for example. I know how much better i could have scored if i studied harder. You know why i say that? Cause i looked through my exam paper and i laughed. I knew about 60 - 70% of the paper, but i couldn't answer most of it because i never studied enough for it. In the last few weeks before my exam, i can shamefully say i was very negligent of my studies. Not to mention in the many months before it.
My maths was in an even worse off shape. From back in Form 4, i never put in enough effort to do my maths properly. An vicious cycle came along - The maths was hard, i didn't bother working hard to try and the maths became even harder. This cycle continued into my Form 6 and it really caused me hell.
Despite all the good support and help given by my friends, most of the time i never even attempted to try to do the maths. Subsequently the work load just overwhelmed me and i just gave up on the subject. See what happened in the end?
Looking at some of my friends in school, their maths initially was just as bad as mine. But through hard work and dedication, many later got satisfactory or even good grades. See the power of effort?
I am ashamed of myself. Guess it takes a really hard lesson before one sees the light. But at least in these 2 years, i learned that "if you want something, you work for it" the hard way.
Another piece of advice i want to share is please please please don't give up. I gave up on my maths and i paid for it. Now, even in university, that decision is coming back to haunt me. I just flipped through my Statistics textbook today, and all i could do was sigh....
Independence - the ability to take initiative and do something yourself - as how i define it.
Well, the school really thought us this lesson. I'm not bad mouthing the teachers or what, but seriously, I have never met such lazy teachers before.
So lazy that the amount of times she ever came into class for the entire year was less than 30 (maybe even less, i counted back then. I forgot now.). So lazy that he never even bothered to mark our trial papers. So lazy that even a signature would take too much effort for him.
Amazing really, in fact so amazing that a lot of people i tell to these stories don't believe me. Would you believe that? Need proof? Just ask any of my form 6 class mates.
Then from my juniors, i only learned this is mostly the case with the teachers of this school. Students run their clubs almost totally independent of the teachers. Students find their own ways and means to study and do well in exams. Student use only their own wits and effort to conjure amazing performances and works.
To me, that is just cool.
The other rude awakening i got, in fact most of us Form 6 got was how bad discrimination can get.
Most 6 formers in the school come from their own secondary schools where they did their form 1 - 5. As a result, the 6 formers in the school was separated into two groups. The first being their "true" students which are student that we originally studying in the school and the second as the "non-true" students who me and a few other friends would fondly call "fakes". In fact, many of us took pride in calling ourselves fakes.
The "non-true" groups were also subsequently divided further. I forgot to mention that school was a boys school for the lower forms and co-ed was only for form 6. Subsequently, we were further divided into the two sexes. The girls would have equal privilege to the "true" students. We, the remaining boys, how should i put it? Treated like shit.
Have any of you'll ever felt the pain of not being acknowledged? Not matter how hard you tried to mix in or tried to be like them. Even if people don't accept you into their circle, i feel the least someone can do is acknowledge that you exist also.
At one of the speeches made by the seniors, he said something that really made us fakes burn in our seat and it was probably the worst instance of insult and discrimination that ever occurred. He was about to graduate and this was his farewell speech. In his own words :
".... To all the True XXXX, and also all the girls, these 2 years will be the best two years of your school life. Enjoy it......"
I have nothing to say. He was the person elected to take care of us the form 6s. I don't know if it was a genuine mistake or he purposely left the extra part out.
The evening on that day, i swore myself as a True SMKBBSP-ian.
Things certainly didn't get any better when it came to the faculty. Although many of the teacher preferred us fakes because we tend to respect the teachers more and were less disruptive (the teacher's words, not mine i have witnesses). Like the students themselves, much of the faculty only saw the trues and the girls in their eyes. Us? We were just extras. When they needed us they would approach us saying we are part of the school and we should help out and support the school activities (mind you, a lot of us did). When they didn't need us, they would find all reasons to criticize us and blame us for certain things that go wrong.
I feel that some of the most pitiful people around around those that are living in denial or those that have no choice but to do so. Imagine having to live a life that is nothing more than a lie and having to believe that lie... Just sad..
Sometimes a fact is just a fact. No matter how much you try to deny it, it will forever be a fact. Yes, in your mind, if you persuade it enough it will most certainly be good, but reality won't budge no matter how hard you try to think it away.
I certainly understand the glorious days that the school once had. Those days even just uttering the name would have inspired awe amongst the people. But nowadays, only in the older generation's eye the school still has the glory. Amongst the youth, the school has become nothing more than a mockery of it's former glory.
Is it so hard to just accept the fact and then take action and improve it? If you did that certain you would command even more respect. I don't deny that in certain aspects the school still does wonderfully, but truly, is it enough?
Respect is earned not demanded. If any people should know this, I am one of those that know this all too well (right dou kei-s?).
Getting people to listen to you or follow your instructions is certainly not hard. Trust me, i know. Getting them to respect you to a very different ball game.
From where i come from ( as in SMKBBSP) and in most schools, to really control the students as a prefect, you must really earn the respect of the students. If i tried what the prefects in my form 6 school did, the instance i stepped out of school i would have a committee waiting for me to give some "love".
I realize that each school will have it's own sets of cultures and practices. I don't criticize the way the prefects of my form 6 school do their job, i just feel there are better and more practical ways to do things. Tradition is something, but it is not everything.
For clarification sake, let me just tell you how the prefects treat us. First of all, they come around screaming and shouting. This is traditionally how they do their job (sometimes though, i just think they take this as an excuse to go around screaming at others and enjoying it while at the job). They kind of act like how gangsters do. When they find some one that opposes them, they will come in a group to confront that student. A few of them, much to our chagrin, does more than scream. They even kick or punch the students that disobey them.
To tell the truth, I'm actually extremely grateful that i went to this school. For all the bad that i feel this school had, it actually did the greatest good for me.
It made me matured.
I have never ever EVER been so patient and tolerant throughout my entire life. Haha... Learning how to swallow down that feeling of discontent, smile and move on with life was probably one of the best lessons the school gave me.
The overall environment of the school is a good reflection of society. By being so materialistic, so judgmental, so discriminative and so unfair, it is a preparation for us to enter society. Maybe this is the true reason why so many students of this school can become so successful. From young, they are taught to be independent, hardworking, optimistic and tolerant. All key traits to be successful. Maybe this is why...
Maybe this is why we should all be thankful to the school...
Before i proceed, let me first share my STPM results :-
Pengajian Am (General Studies) : B+
Mathematics : D
Chemistry : C+
Biology : B+
(C and above are considered principal passes. C- and below are half fails. F is considered complete fail)
To me i am satisfied with the results. But I'll be honest with you, this are actually extremely lousy grades.
If the CGPA is calculated, my CGPA is only 2.58. Yes, i still managed to get local university with these grades, Environmental Science at Universiti Malaysia Sabah. But most people who get such a course would have turned it down immediately, appealed or EXTREMELY reluctantly gone and taken the course.
Nonetheless, with these grades i managed to get into University. I'm now in Australia, for those that didn't know, doing the exact same course that i was offered, Environmental Science. But that's not my topic today.
Like i was saying, i am satisfied with my grades. With my biology marks to be specific. With the other three subjects though, it's a different story.
Why am i satisfied? To honestly tell you, i have never put so much effort before in my life in my studies. The amount of time and work i put into my Biology, i managed to change my grade from an F to a B+. I have a feeling my biology teacher was thanking her lucky stars that she didn't make the "if you pass / get good grades, I'll eat my shoe" bet with me.
In fact, most people that didn't see the effort i put into my this subject were very shocked by that grade i got. I surpassed quite a few other students and matched another few.
As for the other three subjects, my PA (Pengajian Am) was a bit disappointing. I was hoping for at least an A- in it, but i suppose the silly mistake i made cost me the grade. For my chemistry and mathematics, i really have no excuse for it.
I know how much effort i put into those 2 subjects, and it wasn't much mind you. Take my chemistry for example. I know how much better i could have scored if i studied harder. You know why i say that? Cause i looked through my exam paper and i laughed. I knew about 60 - 70% of the paper, but i couldn't answer most of it because i never studied enough for it. In the last few weeks before my exam, i can shamefully say i was very negligent of my studies. Not to mention in the many months before it.
My maths was in an even worse off shape. From back in Form 4, i never put in enough effort to do my maths properly. An vicious cycle came along - The maths was hard, i didn't bother working hard to try and the maths became even harder. This cycle continued into my Form 6 and it really caused me hell.
Despite all the good support and help given by my friends, most of the time i never even attempted to try to do the maths. Subsequently the work load just overwhelmed me and i just gave up on the subject. See what happened in the end?
Looking at some of my friends in school, their maths initially was just as bad as mine. But through hard work and dedication, many later got satisfactory or even good grades. See the power of effort?
I am ashamed of myself. Guess it takes a really hard lesson before one sees the light. But at least in these 2 years, i learned that "if you want something, you work for it" the hard way.
Another piece of advice i want to share is please please please don't give up. I gave up on my maths and i paid for it. Now, even in university, that decision is coming back to haunt me. I just flipped through my Statistics textbook today, and all i could do was sigh....
Independence - the ability to take initiative and do something yourself - as how i define it.
Well, the school really thought us this lesson. I'm not bad mouthing the teachers or what, but seriously, I have never met such lazy teachers before.
So lazy that the amount of times she ever came into class for the entire year was less than 30 (maybe even less, i counted back then. I forgot now.). So lazy that he never even bothered to mark our trial papers. So lazy that even a signature would take too much effort for him.
Amazing really, in fact so amazing that a lot of people i tell to these stories don't believe me. Would you believe that? Need proof? Just ask any of my form 6 class mates.
Then from my juniors, i only learned this is mostly the case with the teachers of this school. Students run their clubs almost totally independent of the teachers. Students find their own ways and means to study and do well in exams. Student use only their own wits and effort to conjure amazing performances and works.
To me, that is just cool.
The other rude awakening i got, in fact most of us Form 6 got was how bad discrimination can get.
Most 6 formers in the school come from their own secondary schools where they did their form 1 - 5. As a result, the 6 formers in the school was separated into two groups. The first being their "true" students which are student that we originally studying in the school and the second as the "non-true" students who me and a few other friends would fondly call "fakes". In fact, many of us took pride in calling ourselves fakes.
The "non-true" groups were also subsequently divided further. I forgot to mention that school was a boys school for the lower forms and co-ed was only for form 6. Subsequently, we were further divided into the two sexes. The girls would have equal privilege to the "true" students. We, the remaining boys, how should i put it? Treated like shit.
Have any of you'll ever felt the pain of not being acknowledged? Not matter how hard you tried to mix in or tried to be like them. Even if people don't accept you into their circle, i feel the least someone can do is acknowledge that you exist also.
At one of the speeches made by the seniors, he said something that really made us fakes burn in our seat and it was probably the worst instance of insult and discrimination that ever occurred. He was about to graduate and this was his farewell speech. In his own words :
".... To all the True XXXX, and also all the girls, these 2 years will be the best two years of your school life. Enjoy it......"
I have nothing to say. He was the person elected to take care of us the form 6s. I don't know if it was a genuine mistake or he purposely left the extra part out.
The evening on that day, i swore myself as a True SMKBBSP-ian.
Things certainly didn't get any better when it came to the faculty. Although many of the teacher preferred us fakes because we tend to respect the teachers more and were less disruptive (the teacher's words, not mine i have witnesses). Like the students themselves, much of the faculty only saw the trues and the girls in their eyes. Us? We were just extras. When they needed us they would approach us saying we are part of the school and we should help out and support the school activities (mind you, a lot of us did). When they didn't need us, they would find all reasons to criticize us and blame us for certain things that go wrong.
I feel that some of the most pitiful people around around those that are living in denial or those that have no choice but to do so. Imagine having to live a life that is nothing more than a lie and having to believe that lie... Just sad..
Sometimes a fact is just a fact. No matter how much you try to deny it, it will forever be a fact. Yes, in your mind, if you persuade it enough it will most certainly be good, but reality won't budge no matter how hard you try to think it away.
I certainly understand the glorious days that the school once had. Those days even just uttering the name would have inspired awe amongst the people. But nowadays, only in the older generation's eye the school still has the glory. Amongst the youth, the school has become nothing more than a mockery of it's former glory.
Is it so hard to just accept the fact and then take action and improve it? If you did that certain you would command even more respect. I don't deny that in certain aspects the school still does wonderfully, but truly, is it enough?
Respect is earned not demanded. If any people should know this, I am one of those that know this all too well (right dou kei-s?).
Getting people to listen to you or follow your instructions is certainly not hard. Trust me, i know. Getting them to respect you to a very different ball game.
From where i come from ( as in SMKBBSP) and in most schools, to really control the students as a prefect, you must really earn the respect of the students. If i tried what the prefects in my form 6 school did, the instance i stepped out of school i would have a committee waiting for me to give some "love".
I realize that each school will have it's own sets of cultures and practices. I don't criticize the way the prefects of my form 6 school do their job, i just feel there are better and more practical ways to do things. Tradition is something, but it is not everything.
For clarification sake, let me just tell you how the prefects treat us. First of all, they come around screaming and shouting. This is traditionally how they do their job (sometimes though, i just think they take this as an excuse to go around screaming at others and enjoying it while at the job). They kind of act like how gangsters do. When they find some one that opposes them, they will come in a group to confront that student. A few of them, much to our chagrin, does more than scream. They even kick or punch the students that disobey them.
To tell the truth, I'm actually extremely grateful that i went to this school. For all the bad that i feel this school had, it actually did the greatest good for me.
It made me matured.
I have never ever EVER been so patient and tolerant throughout my entire life. Haha... Learning how to swallow down that feeling of discontent, smile and move on with life was probably one of the best lessons the school gave me.
The overall environment of the school is a good reflection of society. By being so materialistic, so judgmental, so discriminative and so unfair, it is a preparation for us to enter society. Maybe this is the true reason why so many students of this school can become so successful. From young, they are taught to be independent, hardworking, optimistic and tolerant. All key traits to be successful. Maybe this is why...
Maybe this is why we should all be thankful to the school...
My form 6 life (Part I : People i met)
This is the story about my form 6 life. I must mention before hand here, that what i write may offend certain people. I will stress that sometimes this is fact and what i can see from my perspective. Whether you want to accept it or not, it's up to you. Also do remember I'm not out to bad mouth anyone or anything, I'm just telling the story from my point of view.
On May 15 2006, i took my first step into this new school where i would be spending the next one and a half years doing my form 6. Before this, i was in a dilemma on where go for my for six, whether i should do it in a public secondary school or a private college.
I have had plenty of warnings and advice from my seniors from coming to this public school. The school despite having a reputation of being one of the premier schools in Malaysia, had a lousy faculty (generally speaking with exceptions) and many problems such as discrimination and bullying among the student body.
Yet i choose to come here and also stay. Why? One reason i must admit was for the name of the school. The other reason is because I have been instilled with the belief that anyone can succeed anywhere with the right amount dedication and hard work.
When i arrived, i had only one of my darlings with me. He too was not one of those i was especially close with. Nonetheless, he proved a great source of comfort, friendship and support throughout my choppy life there. For this I am extremely grateful to him, and because of all that we had to go through together in this school, we subsequently became very close (please stop your dirty thought NOW, thank you).
In my form 6 was the first time i had to chance to interact with people from so many various backgrounds - different schools, different family upbringings, different community background. In a way it helped me expand my horizon greatly. Here i must mention a lovely young lady from my class. Her openness initially left me extremely shocked, which led me to think she would be those wild type of girls and.... You get the idea. Yet as time went by, i came to greatly respect her. She was an extremely friendly girl, she would make friends with you without prejudice and most importantly was her sincerity even in those short moments she came and said "Hi".
She was the first person that truly thought me that we should never judge someone from what we can see. Even after we graduated, the fact that she still took the time to care about us, left me hanging my head in shame.
I also met another person who shared as much passion as me for the world around us. I really salute him. Like me, he decided to break free from convention and follow his heart and dreams. He went and took up a degree in forestry in the university in Sabah. In Malaysia, courses such as forestry, environmental science etc are considered cold courses. Courses that are left only for those with mediocre results, those who just want to waste their time and those that have no other choice in degrees to pursue.
Yet, he took up this course with passion. When people criticized him, he just took it in his stride and stuck with his guns. He's now there, preparing to go (or already gone) for a field research in Tenom, Sabah. He too, became one of my very good friends within this short time. He to me is an excellent role model. The most important trait being have to courage to pursue one's dreams despite the stigma from the people around him. Extremely responsible and friendly, he too, like the lady mentioned earlier, had no prejudice when it came to making friends.
I must admit, for my class in form 6, most individuals in my opinion are very materialistic. A lot of them become extremely selfish when the time arises. I always wonder is it just that I myself am very naive in thinking that everyone is this world should act so and so then we can all live in peace and happiness? I don't know. But studying in this school has truly shown me how harsh society can get.
From where i come from for my last 5 years of secondary school study, we never had such serious problems of backstabbing, boycotting. No matter who lousy our teachers were back then, we always showed a minimum amount of respect towards them. Here, if the students don't a teacher, they can total ignore his/her existence. But when the time comes and the teacher's help is required, they got back and start licking the teacher's boot madly.
Then there is teacher which will be forever burned into my mind. As of my 19years and 7months of life, i have never met a teacher as irresponsible as him. Have you ever met a teacher that goes, "i didn't have my breakfast today, i can't teach, will you please study on your own". He too was also the teacher advisor for my society. If we, the committee did anything successfully, he would immediately take credit for it saying that it was his idea and without his help we could never had done it. If something screws up, he will blame us for not asking his opinion before making a decision. If the things screws up because of his advice, he will immediately deny any involvement and say he never said anything of such a nature.
I always wonder, how do people like my teacher above sleep at night. How do they answer to their conscience? How? If it's me and i do something small, i will already have a hard time sleeping and just having that dreaded feeling that it will come back around to me....
Another thing that always lingers on my mind is "am i crazy? is something wrong with me?" The reason is due to my kids. To clarify this once and for all, my kids are the collective term i use for my scout juniors. The main reason i call them my kids is because they act like a bunch of them (crap, I'm gonna get beaten up once i get back to Malaysia) and because usually it's my responsibility to teach them and get them to behave.
Anyway, coming back, i used to think i was crazy because i would get so concerned and worried over them. Then i met this guy. He too had a bunch of "kids" (he called his juniors). Like me he was just as passionate about them as me (not as caring though). Among his juniors, he commanded respect and awe. In contrast to me i think i mostly projected an image of being a nice big brother which resulted in more often than not my kids scrambling all over my head. =S
Don't get me wrong, we both enjoyed how own respective groups treated us. What I'm trying to say is, for both me and him, these are people who much of our lives are centered around. And to people out there, it just shows I'm not alone and certainly not fully crazy (partly maybe XD).
Of cause i met more people in the one and half years there. These are the few along with their traits that have left a strong impression on me. Everyone i meet leaves a strong impression on me, but sadly, i can never finish telling you'll about them One, because I'm lazy. Two, also cause it's not practical to write out everyone cause you won't want to read it.
In the mean time this is just one part of the story. There are a few more parts, which i will write about later. Then also from this story comes one very important thing which you will find out in due time.
On May 15 2006, i took my first step into this new school where i would be spending the next one and a half years doing my form 6. Before this, i was in a dilemma on where go for my for six, whether i should do it in a public secondary school or a private college.
I have had plenty of warnings and advice from my seniors from coming to this public school. The school despite having a reputation of being one of the premier schools in Malaysia, had a lousy faculty (generally speaking with exceptions) and many problems such as discrimination and bullying among the student body.
Yet i choose to come here and also stay. Why? One reason i must admit was for the name of the school. The other reason is because I have been instilled with the belief that anyone can succeed anywhere with the right amount dedication and hard work.
When i arrived, i had only one of my darlings with me. He too was not one of those i was especially close with. Nonetheless, he proved a great source of comfort, friendship and support throughout my choppy life there. For this I am extremely grateful to him, and because of all that we had to go through together in this school, we subsequently became very close (please stop your dirty thought NOW, thank you).
In my form 6 was the first time i had to chance to interact with people from so many various backgrounds - different schools, different family upbringings, different community background. In a way it helped me expand my horizon greatly. Here i must mention a lovely young lady from my class. Her openness initially left me extremely shocked, which led me to think she would be those wild type of girls and.... You get the idea. Yet as time went by, i came to greatly respect her. She was an extremely friendly girl, she would make friends with you without prejudice and most importantly was her sincerity even in those short moments she came and said "Hi".
She was the first person that truly thought me that we should never judge someone from what we can see. Even after we graduated, the fact that she still took the time to care about us, left me hanging my head in shame.
I also met another person who shared as much passion as me for the world around us. I really salute him. Like me, he decided to break free from convention and follow his heart and dreams. He went and took up a degree in forestry in the university in Sabah. In Malaysia, courses such as forestry, environmental science etc are considered cold courses. Courses that are left only for those with mediocre results, those who just want to waste their time and those that have no other choice in degrees to pursue.
Yet, he took up this course with passion. When people criticized him, he just took it in his stride and stuck with his guns. He's now there, preparing to go (or already gone) for a field research in Tenom, Sabah. He too, became one of my very good friends within this short time. He to me is an excellent role model. The most important trait being have to courage to pursue one's dreams despite the stigma from the people around him. Extremely responsible and friendly, he too, like the lady mentioned earlier, had no prejudice when it came to making friends.
I must admit, for my class in form 6, most individuals in my opinion are very materialistic. A lot of them become extremely selfish when the time arises. I always wonder is it just that I myself am very naive in thinking that everyone is this world should act so and so then we can all live in peace and happiness? I don't know. But studying in this school has truly shown me how harsh society can get.
From where i come from for my last 5 years of secondary school study, we never had such serious problems of backstabbing, boycotting. No matter who lousy our teachers were back then, we always showed a minimum amount of respect towards them. Here, if the students don't a teacher, they can total ignore his/her existence. But when the time comes and the teacher's help is required, they got back and start licking the teacher's boot madly.
Then there is teacher which will be forever burned into my mind. As of my 19years and 7months of life, i have never met a teacher as irresponsible as him. Have you ever met a teacher that goes, "i didn't have my breakfast today, i can't teach, will you please study on your own". He too was also the teacher advisor for my society. If we, the committee did anything successfully, he would immediately take credit for it saying that it was his idea and without his help we could never had done it. If something screws up, he will blame us for not asking his opinion before making a decision. If the things screws up because of his advice, he will immediately deny any involvement and say he never said anything of such a nature.
I always wonder, how do people like my teacher above sleep at night. How do they answer to their conscience? How? If it's me and i do something small, i will already have a hard time sleeping and just having that dreaded feeling that it will come back around to me....
Another thing that always lingers on my mind is "am i crazy? is something wrong with me?" The reason is due to my kids. To clarify this once and for all, my kids are the collective term i use for my scout juniors. The main reason i call them my kids is because they act like a bunch of them (crap, I'm gonna get beaten up once i get back to Malaysia) and because usually it's my responsibility to teach them and get them to behave.
Anyway, coming back, i used to think i was crazy because i would get so concerned and worried over them. Then i met this guy. He too had a bunch of "kids" (he called his juniors). Like me he was just as passionate about them as me (not as caring though). Among his juniors, he commanded respect and awe. In contrast to me i think i mostly projected an image of being a nice big brother which resulted in more often than not my kids scrambling all over my head. =S
Don't get me wrong, we both enjoyed how own respective groups treated us. What I'm trying to say is, for both me and him, these are people who much of our lives are centered around. And to people out there, it just shows I'm not alone and certainly not fully crazy (partly maybe XD).
Of cause i met more people in the one and half years there. These are the few along with their traits that have left a strong impression on me. Everyone i meet leaves a strong impression on me, but sadly, i can never finish telling you'll about them One, because I'm lazy. Two, also cause it's not practical to write out everyone cause you won't want to read it.
In the mean time this is just one part of the story. There are a few more parts, which i will write about later. Then also from this story comes one very important thing which you will find out in due time.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
Of cold clammy hands, Jian LAI & shared toilets
The first day in Australia, and it had to be the coldest....
Well, according to the locals, today has been the coldest day of winter in Brisbane yet. This to me, is relief~~ Now I'm pretty sure I'll be able to handle most of the weather that is thrown at me.
Don't get me wrong, it's is still D*** cold, just now as i was walking to dinner, i was so cold that when i got in to the canteen, my hands were shivering so badly that you could see the tea cup i was holding wobbling and drops of teh falling out... Brr....
Despite that, i find the weather pleasing. There's quite a bit of sunshine and it just brings out the adventurous spirit within oneself. I spend most of my time between lunch and dinner just exploring around campus.
The first thing you notice are... Ooo~~ Pretty flowers~~ Ooo~~ Lots of trees~~ Yup, i can say the campus is actually much more beautiful than i imagined. The whole place is just bursting with nature. The next thing you see are all the pretty and colourful birds flying round the place. The best part is, they're not even scared of you. They're big, pigeon or crow sized, and they land just less that an arm length to you...
Yes i know, where are the pictures. I got lazy, lets put it this way. I was busy admiring the surroundings myself that just didn't feel like taking pictures.
Oh, and my new name is Jian LAI. Well, at least that's what written on my student card. Sometimes i just don't understand those ang mo kia, can't they put in the middle name also?? =.= It's not just me too, there was another girl who also had a mistake with her ID card, her name on the card wasn't even a legal name, just a preferred name... Kesian those people at the student administration, they have to go and edit the data all over again.
Anyone heard of communal toilets? Toilets that are shared? Sure you have, most probably you might have even used one before. But have you ever been into a communal one that is shared? Yes, i see the repetition there also. This second share however, is with members of the opposite sex.
The latrines (the place where you bang sai) have wall that don't block all the way up or down. If you jump lightly or bend down... Well... You might get lucky la, lets just put it. The showers are slightly better though. The have a curtain there, but most of the showers have the curtain missing... So... heh heh... Need i say more?
I'll just say, it was a very uneasy experience. I had a VERY STRONG motivation before i used the latrines (and i mean really strong pushing, pressuring sensation) and i finished up as fast as possible... And the shower was probably one of the quickest in my life.
That's all la for now, still plenty of stories, won't finish writing them all tonight. I'm gonna leave them for another day.
Well, according to the locals, today has been the coldest day of winter in Brisbane yet. This to me, is relief~~ Now I'm pretty sure I'll be able to handle most of the weather that is thrown at me.
Don't get me wrong, it's is still D*** cold, just now as i was walking to dinner, i was so cold that when i got in to the canteen, my hands were shivering so badly that you could see the tea cup i was holding wobbling and drops of teh falling out... Brr....
Despite that, i find the weather pleasing. There's quite a bit of sunshine and it just brings out the adventurous spirit within oneself. I spend most of my time between lunch and dinner just exploring around campus.
The first thing you notice are... Ooo~~ Pretty flowers~~ Ooo~~ Lots of trees~~ Yup, i can say the campus is actually much more beautiful than i imagined. The whole place is just bursting with nature. The next thing you see are all the pretty and colourful birds flying round the place. The best part is, they're not even scared of you. They're big, pigeon or crow sized, and they land just less that an arm length to you...
Yes i know, where are the pictures. I got lazy, lets put it this way. I was busy admiring the surroundings myself that just didn't feel like taking pictures.
Oh, and my new name is Jian LAI. Well, at least that's what written on my student card. Sometimes i just don't understand those ang mo kia, can't they put in the middle name also?? =.= It's not just me too, there was another girl who also had a mistake with her ID card, her name on the card wasn't even a legal name, just a preferred name... Kesian those people at the student administration, they have to go and edit the data all over again.
Anyone heard of communal toilets? Toilets that are shared? Sure you have, most probably you might have even used one before. But have you ever been into a communal one that is shared? Yes, i see the repetition there also. This second share however, is with members of the opposite sex.
The latrines (the place where you bang sai) have wall that don't block all the way up or down. If you jump lightly or bend down... Well... You might get lucky la, lets just put it. The showers are slightly better though. The have a curtain there, but most of the showers have the curtain missing... So... heh heh... Need i say more?
I'll just say, it was a very uneasy experience. I had a VERY STRONG motivation before i used the latrines (and i mean really strong pushing, pressuring sensation) and i finished up as fast as possible... And the shower was probably one of the quickest in my life.
That's all la for now, still plenty of stories, won't finish writing them all tonight. I'm gonna leave them for another day.
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